Saturday Night Social: Everyone Say 'Thank You, Lesbians'

Illustration for article titled Saturday Night Social: Everyone Say Thank You, Lesbians
Photo: Steven Ferdman (Getty Images)

What’s business in the front, party in the back, and seeping lesbian erasure out from every side? Why, it’s all the latest trend reporting on how the mullet is a mul-HOT hairstyle for people of all genders to rock again, as if lesbians and the lesbian-adjacent haven’t been giving themselves yon ‘do to varying degrees of success this whole time.

In case you’re not aware, the mullet has apparently been deemed fashionable again. Priya Elan, deputy fashion editor over at The Guardian, writes that the cut joined the ranks of the buzzcut, cute bangs, shitty bangs, and the dissociative growout as one of the most popular hairstyles of the year, largely thanks to how simple and easy it is to D.I.Y. at home amidst all of the coronavirus pandemic-related shutdowns of salons and barbershops.

Celebrities have even gotten in on the action, with Zac Efron, Joe Exotic, Troye Sivan, Rihanna, Miley Cyrus, Leigh-Anne Pinnock, Crystal Methyd, and a full quarter of the Euphoria cast sporting mullets by year’s end, too.

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In his piece for The Guardian, Elan vaguely gestures at who’s kept the hairstyle’s blood pumping over the years, even when it’s not been considered en vogue by the mainstream (The gender-neutral roots of Bowie’s cut come full circle to the modern mullet of today, with LGBTQI icons from Joan Jett to Tegan and Sara and Christine from Christine and the Queens all sporting them.”). But why not celebrate its very particular lesbionicité and cite the real legends who’ve kept it alive all these years? For example…my friend, Tyler! And my friend, Rider, a while back! My friend, Nia, too, for like a hot sec! Arguably, my friends, Lena and Mitra, as well! Like, two to four people I’ve met named Mel! I could honestly keep going, but in the interest of time I’ll keep this quick: Lesbians and the lesbian-adjacent are style icons, America, and they will get their due!

Freelance journalist (GQ, Esquire, Out, elsewhere), here on weekends

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Krispy Porkchops

Shelter Catstravaganza!

Introductions! More kittens! Surprise encounters! Hijinks! Let’s begin!

Most of my visits, I found Leo and Max cuddling, so I didn’t disturb. But yesterday they were actually out and about, so I was excited to visit with them. Sadly, the kitchen noises led them to falsely believe they were about to get fed, and I was not able to distract them from the impending dashing of their hopes. Oh well!

KitKat, as always, looking for ways to be cute, and succeeding.

Butt rub for Woody!

Buddy is settling in nicely in his new room, but Donegal is still being rather aloof about the whole thing.

Fritz is now a free roamer and I’ve discovered his favorite pastime is playing with a blue fuzzball. Noir is *fascinated* by this and studies Fritz carefully, which is okay until he gets too close. Personal space, man!

Quarantine is lifted, so I visited my FeLV kitties. Pink was especially outgoing and seeking attention.

Mister was happy to have a visitor, and even interrupted my time with Logan for a mutual grooming session.

“But.....this fuzzball isn’t blue!”

Another batch of kittens! I call them the Donut kittens, starting with mama Kristie Kreme. She is *very* shy, so she’s receiving lullaby therapy and plenty of TLC.

I tried to keep track of who was who, and they did have collars with names, but too much active kittening made them hard to keep track of, so I separated them into two groups. Dunkin and Randi were the extroverts, while LaMars, Winchell and Conroy were the shy ones.

Randi is the photobomber.

Progress! Matt Dillon and Griffin no longer need to be coaxed to come out and visit!

Ouch.

Curious, are we?

Tiger is the lone shy holdout in the room, so I started a new ritual. I slide both hands underneath and slowly lift her about two or three inches off the bed, talking to her the whole time. I put her down after about fifteen seconds, and the look of shock on her face is priceless. But no resistance!

Remember Frosty, the elusive one who doesn’t let me touch him and judges me? Well, I stepped into his room for the first time in weeks, and this happened. Color me surprised.

I also hadn’t visited Helvetica and Gill for a long time. They are doing just fine, TYVM. I always marvel at how a cat yawn looks so intimidating when captured on film.

Followed by a good cheek scritch.

Four of the five Muppet Kittens have already been adopted, leaving just Camilla and mama Henson.

Finally, downstairs. Climber and Merlin, when asked, denied they were ever shy around me last week and oh, BTW, pointed out that I’m not paying enough attention to them.

Now that her kittens have all been adopted, Mama Paddi-Whack moved to her own room and is enjoying a little peace and quiet.

Bob and Bart inroduced themselves to me in memorable ways. The first time I touched Bart (black), I discovered he was wearing most of the contents of his water bowl. Oopsie! Bob (ebony tabby) has proven himself to be a skilled escape artist.

I’ve been thinking that I could make an entire photo book out of Patti’s various sleep positions. Her bones seem to turn to jelly, it’s amazing.

Finally, in honor of the one-year anniversary of his adoption (yesterday), I give you....drum-roll....Intellectual Bruce.