Screenshot: Twitter

I know that headlines have been resembling Mad Libs for the past two years or so, but one I saw on TMZ early Monday morning is one of the most ridiculous examples in some time. TWO CELEBRITIES: Tom Arnold, Mark Burnett. PAST TENSE VERB: Choked. EVENT: Emmy’s party. RESULT: TOM ARNOLD – MARK BURNETT CHOKED ME AT PRE-EMMY PARTY... Burnett Says Arnold was the Aggressor.

So Arnold claimed Burnett “went apeshit,” choked him, and “ran away with his torn pink shirt & missing gold chain.” Burnett responded by saying Arnold started it. Then Roma Downy, Burnett’s wife and former star of Touched By An Angel, chimed in to add that she was injured during the scuffle. “Got this bruise tonight when Tom Arnold tried to ambush my husband Mark and me at a charity event,” Downy tweeted alongside a photo of her bruised hand. “Is your TV show worth it Tom? Please stop.” Arnold responded by calling Roma a “psycho.”

But wait! The TV show! We haven’t even gotten to the TV show. Arnold has been working with Vice to track down some tapes of Donald Trump saying the n-word (among other offensive language) while filming The Apprentice back when he was just a reality star. Burnett, the show’s creator, has said for some time now that he has no access to the tapes “because they’re owned by MGM.” The show premieres tomorrow, which seems like a happy coincidence!

Oh! Kevin Bacon was also there, in case you needed proof that we’re living in a simulation.

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One more thing:

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Ugh, sorry, I lied. One more thing:

[TMZ]


Richard Gere’s pregnant wife Alejandra Silva was just blessed by the Dalai Lama. I know this because she posted a photo of herself being blessed by the Dalai Lama.

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  • “The wedding was not planned far in advance; planner Mindy Weiss had just 48 hours.” [E! Online]
  • Where the FUCK is Fan Bingbing?! [Deadline]
  • Cate Blanchett claims she’s not cool. I disagree. [Just Jared]
  • I flat out refuse to believe anything I read about Shauna Sexton. [Celebitchy]
  • It wasn’t me, I promise. [TMZ]