After two years of marital bliss, 19-year-old Courtney Stodden has split from her 53-year-old husband Doug Hutchison. People, people, I know this is hard, and I know what you’re thinking: “Hhhhhhhhuuuuuuuuuggghhh, this bra iiiiiiiitches. Should I order cheesy bread or nachos? Wait…did I turn the space heater off? Whatever. Oh hey, is that Jeff over there? Jeff! JEFF!!! JEEEEFF!!! Oh, nevermind, it’s not Jeff. Uuuugh, quit looking over here, not-Jeff. Hhhhhhh. Man, I have to poop.” Yes. Indeed. I think we can all relate.