Religious Right Promises A Gay Inaugural Orgy

Peter LaBarbera of Americans For Truth About Homosexuality and Jennifer Girou, of Women Influencing the Nation, are promising that the LGBT events occurring around the inauguration will be little more than an orgy. Hooray!

Because, really, what’s an inauguration about if not some public same-sex buttsecksing and rug-munching? LaBarbera explains:

“I think most Americans would be put off if they knew what went on at these parties,” LaBarbera said. “Every special interest group has a ball of some sort, but this is not just any special interest group. More than half the country considers their behavior immoral.”

From LaBarbera’s in-depth research watching literally loads of gay and lesbian orgiastic pornography, he just knows that all gay people every do is take their clothes off and shag when ever possible. Hanging out with other gay men and lesbians is just an excuse to get naked and have other men suck his, I mean, their dicks and engage in the anal sex and watch women make other women writhe in orgasm with only their tongues! And it’s going to be going on this weekend. In plain view of the Capitol! At parties! LaBarbera has some other weekend plans besides exposing himself to the gay inaugural orgies: he’s going to infiltrate the Mid-Atlantic Leather Weekend, a leather daddy festival. You know, to expose it. He’s going to get pictures and everything, which he might publish when he’s done with them.

Giroux is equally concerned:

“It’s not a day where a group that feels like it has some payback coming should be putting its decadent lifestyle on display.”

See, Giroux has devoted her life to making sure that those big, mean lesbians don’t get equal rights and keep their sultry tongues away from the clitori of all the good, moral, totally straight women of the United States, and she’s afraid they might punish her. You know, because she’s been soooo naughty, she’s really, truly worried that if all the lesbians got together in one place in their mannish suits and glamorous gowns and saw her, they might just have to tie her up and punish her while taking all their clothes off and enjoying it nearly as much as she would.

Anyway, it’s just sort of curious to me that instead of assuming that a bunch of people who paid upwards of $350 for tickets to a formal event and concert featuring a number of top entertainers in the Mayflower Hotel — made famous by the heterosexual shenanigans of a certain Democratic former governor — would go, dance, drink and enjoy the music like at every other party in D.C. on Tuesday night, these stalwarts of the anti-LGBT movement would think that LGBT life is all one crazy orgiastic porno. But, perhaps that’s all of being a LGBT individual they’ve ever experienced.