Reader Roundup

Wednesdays are always wild, and the best comments of the day cannot be tamed!

Best Comment Of The Day, in response to Spermy Side Up: "Usually it's the Over-Easy Eggs that get fertilized. Those hussies." • Best Comment Of The Day, in response to All Grown Up: "Apparently, he was able to avoid being Knutered." • Best Comment Of The Day, in response to Environmentalists, Teens Mourn The Loss Of Outdoor Sex Hotspot: "This gives 'stop beating around the bush' a whole new meaning." And!:

Not so long ago, in a land not so far away lived the Lorax. The land was pristine. The Brown Bar-ba-loots enjoyed everyday boning and dancing around without their bar-ba-loot suits, and the Swomee-Swans would screw around in the clean air and the Humming Fish would frolick around and sing in the crystal clear water. But United Utilities passed through this beautiful paradise and saw that the Sexee-Sex was bad for business. So United Utilities chopped down a Truffula tree and began knitting a Thneed. Suddenly the Lorax jumped out from the tree stump and said, "Excuse me Mister. I am the Lorax, I speak for the trees for the trees have no tongues. What have you done with my Truffula tuft?" United Utilities explained that outdoor boning necessitated the destruction of the Truffula trees, and the Lorax's head exploded. The end!

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Reminder: If you see a great, funny, insightful, eloquent (or awful) comment, nominate it! Email the comment and the timestamp link to the left of the comment to Hortense at commenters@jezebel.com.



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