Project Runway: "Jackie Kennedy Would Not Have Camel Toe"

The challenge: To use Jackie Kennedy as inspiration and create “classic American sportswear.” But what’s considered “classic,” or “American” or “sportswear” varied wildly amongst the designers!

Why the contestants had to leave the workroom and visit Tim Gunn at an alternate location where he could stand in front of pictures of Jackie Kennedy is a mystery. Also a mystery: Why any designers looked scared or anxious about the challenge. It should have been easy!

Michael D. was hilarious last night. Mescaline. Yes.

Michael D. also explained to us the “gauges” of Tim Gunn.

Quote of the night.

Highlights and lowlights from the runway:
Gretchen continued her love affair with baby poo colors. Jackie Kennedy wouldn’t like how shapeless this is, would she? Anyway. Gretchen was safe.

Michael C. made a dress that Valerie thought looked like a Donna Karan knockoff. He was safe.

The judges loved Christopher’s dress, but hated his wrap/stole/shrug thing. Heidi Klum called it a “dirty old rug.” He was safe.

Michael Kors said Ivy made an “elegant” ensemble. Heidi Klum thought it had “too much design.” But Ivy was safe.

Mondo turned out a really smart little outfit. Heidi called it “sharp,” Nina Garcia called it “smart,” and everyone rejoiced. Mondo was the winner!

No one liked Valerie’s outfit. April said it was street wear, not sportswear, whatever that means. April also said it was “Jackie Yo” and not “Jackie O.” Valerie was in the bottom, but she was safe.

Andy got shredded to pieces on the runway. Nina called this a “trainwreck.” Heidi said “I feel like I’m on a different planet,” since in this universe, Jackie Kennedy would never wear anything like this. Tim Gunn kept telling Andy, “it’s so you.” As in: Not Jackie Kennedy. But Andy was safe.

Michael D, on the other hand, was auf’d for his “schizophrenic” outfit that was “old lady” on top and “cheerleader” on the bottom. The judges also called it “ill-fitting” and “totally unflattering.” Bye, Michael! You had an awesome sense of humor.

As an aside: January Jones was the most boring guest judge EVER. She had nothing to say. (If you missed it, you can see some of her commentary here.) She should have come as Betty Draper and told the losing designers to go to their rooms.

But back to Mondo. Tap dancing! He fills my heart with glee! Click here for a silly gif!