Image: AP

Oprah Winfrey and Gayle King have started a video series titled “The OG Chronicles.” According to OprahMag.com, they will answer readers questions and give them advice on a number of topics. The first one is on dating, and while it is my personal belief that almost no one gives good advice, if I were to seek guidance from anyone, it might as well be Oprah.

The first question is from someone looking for advice on how to spice up their relationship with their longterm partner, as they are “newly empty-nesters.” A reasonable inquiry. Oprah—who has also taken this video opportunity to remind us she can pull off round eyeglasses—reveals that not all roads lead to sexy town, contrary to popular thinking:

“Once I tried this, this was so many years ago, and I got the whole negligee thing and I’m standing at the stairs when he comes in, and he literally comes in—Steadman—and he walks right past me and he says, ‘What are you doing?’”

Gayle agrees:

Gayle: “I got one better, wrapped myself up with Saran Wrap—”

Oprah: “No you didn’t—”

Gayle: “Yes I did, when I was married, put on a trench coat, he came home, [I say] ‘Ta-da!’ and he went, ‘What is that?’ So that’s not good for your ego.”

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Oprah’s real advice on the matter is very sensible, which is that one should ask one’s partner what is sexy to them, instead of assuming it’s wrapping oneself in plastic wrap. She also suggests making food:

“For me, I gotta say, making cornbread kind of serves the purpose. I made some cornbread yesterday, and you woulda thought I stripped myself butt-naked.”

She goes on here, and it is honestly worth listening to yourself because of how hard she is trying to talk without bursting into laughter:

Like, a little cornbread and black-eyed peas goes a long way in my house.

I am not going to imagine what went on in Oprah’s household the day she made cornbread, but may we all find as much success in the bedroom as she does.