No Carolers Left Behind in Kirk Cameron Protest

Illustration for article titled No Carolers Left Behind in Kirk Cameron Protest
Image: Win McNamee (Getty Images)

When I was a wee small child I saw several Left Behind films starring actor and enthusiastic Christian Kirk Cameron. To this day, whenever I can’t get my mother on the phone, a small part of me assumes the Rapture has taken place and I’ve been left behind. This means I will have to live through the trials of judgment day, which result in my being cast into hell for renouncing Jesus Christ as my personal savior. That’s a lot.

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But it turns out there is something worse than imagining the Rapture and that is Kirk Cameron gathering hundreds of people outside of a mall to protest extended stay at home orders. Just take them all, Lord.

For some reason, Cameron is personally offended by California’s stay at home orders, which are intended to slow the spread of the coronavirus over the holiday season, a time that usually sees an uptick in social gatherings. As such, his new holiday hobby is recruiting people to sing Christmas carols as a form of protestsans masks, of course. On Tuesday night, Cameron held his third caroling protest in the Thousand Oaks area of California, although this one had a smaller attendance than his last two. Perhaps some of the carolers are feeling unwell? A little tightness in the throat? Must be a bug going around.

In an Instagram post discussing his protest last week, Cameron likened the current state of his community to the “scary” film, The Giver. Cameron believes that government officials asking people to wear masks and limiting their movement to slow a deadly virus that has killed hundreds of thousands is akin to the film’s plot of a totalitarian government “redefining life and reality” for its citizens.

Perhaps Cameron sees himself as the titular giver and believes that thousands of unemployed and struggling will be cheered through the holiday season by the joy of song. But perhaps he should get a fucking clue, Cameron might realize a large caroling quest can easily turn into a super spreader event and kill people who weren’t even present. And, not that it matters, but Cameron’s carolers were out of tune: a disgrace to real carolers who train all year for the holiday season.

DISCUSSION

I know this isn’t the point of this post, but the idea that God is going to torture people forever because they didn’t like him enough, or didn’t like him the right way, is just deeply fucked up. The idea that this would be good, rather than pathetic and needy, is also deeply fucked up. I know lots of religious people don’t hold these beliefs, but way too many do.