Never, Ever Dress a Child in This 'Future Bride' Onesie

Illustration for article titled Never, Ever Dress a Child in This 'Future Bride' Onesie

This ridiculous onesie and centuries of feminist progress* are currently for sale on Zulily. Here's a description taken from the product's page:

Full of glitz and glam, Lyn Dorf crafts baby basics to be red carpet smash hits. Keeping in line with the demands of their esteemed clientele, they never forget that the most important part of being an infant is staying comfy and fine. Thus, even while showing off precious flair, each piece maintains down-to-earth, body snuggling charm.


I'm sorry — are those crystals on a onesie? Great, when your baby rips them off and chows down, it's gonna be a fun trip to the emergency room.

Originally an insane $26, now you can humiliate your baby for a mere $14.99 — that works out to about $7.50 per wear. The only way I'd find this acceptable is if two girls (or two boys!) were posed together in them whilst holding hands. Because, adorable. Otherwise, please avoid.

[H/t Ashley]




Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew.

Though let's not disparage humiliating babies. That's just hilarious and they don't care... because they're babies. And sometimes it works out. Like that time I put a long red wig on my son: the happy chappy smiled and refused to take it off for about half an hour. This is the kid who won't even wear a hat.