Welcome to Megyn Kelly Today, Today, a new daily column in which we will share the most memorable things that happened on Megyn Kelly Today every morning until we are no longer able to watch Megyn Kelly Today without feeling like there will be no tomorrow.
- Megyn Kelly affirmed her love for Greg Kinnear by saying, “Now this is as good as it gets,” while teasing Greg Kinnear’s appearance.
- Megyn Kelly walked onstage in a sort of pale purple dress.
- Megyn Kelly talked about Lulu the CIA labrador.
- Megyn Kelly said the story about Lulu “went viral on the internet.”
- Megyn Kelly talked condescendingly about a school that renamed their Halloween events to “black and orange spirit day.”
- Bobby Finger thought this was pretty rich holiday commentary coming from someone who once went on a tear about Santa being white.
- Megyn Kelly welcomed Jeff Rossen (of Rossen Reports) to the stage.
- Bobby Finger wondered whether or not Jeff Rossen was promoting yet another book.
- Jeff Rossen told a story about a couple discovering that their airbnb host hid a camera in the bedroom.
- Jeff Rossen revealed that he secretly filmed the Megyn Kelly audience in the “Peacock Lounge” with a tiny camera hidden in a water bottle.
- Megyn Kelly said, “Can I tell you, this reminds me of a story I should probably not tell on television.”
- Megyn Kelly told a story about a time she and her husband Doug noticed what may have been a hidden camera in a hotel room while they were “in an indiscrete moment.” (She was talking about a little ackshawn.)
- Jeff Rossen interrupted before we found out whether or not Megyn Kelly actually found a hidden camera or not.
- Jeff Rossen revealed there was a hidden camera in his coffee cup.
- Megyn Kelly said, “We’ll be right back after this break with Greg Kinneeeeeeeeear!”
- Megyn Kelly Today cut to a shot of Greg Kinnear in a hallway.
- Greg Kinnear had no idea what to do, so he made a face and picked up an envelope.
- Bobby Finger realized Greg Kinnear was there to promote that [presumably] awful new movie (based on a true story) called Same Kind of Different As Me.
- Megyn Kelly asked Greg Kinnear, “Is it odd for you to play a real man? He’s here. He can see you.”
- Greg Kinnear said, “I like the idea of playing real people.”
- Greg Kinnear told an iconic story about filming Nurse Betty!
- Megyn Kelly asked the audience, “Do you remember Greg when he was the host of Talk Soup? Remember that?”
- The audience applauded.
- Megyn Kelly said, “Halloween is just days away! And to help us step up our own Halloween party game with some spooky snacks, maybe even spookier, is Today food contributor Elizabeth Heiskell.”
- Elizabeth Heiskell began speaking and was immediately too much for me to deal with.
- Elizabeth Heiskell revealed a skull covered in prosciutto and Bobby Finger thought, “Wow, it’s me watching Megyn Kelly Today.”
- Elizabeth Heiskell said, “Honey, this is the only time you’re gonna find a skull on my dining room table ever.”
- Elizabeth Heiskell said, “Honey, in the south we do everything in the world with a deviled egg.”
- Elizabeth Heiskell said, “Now look, these are some lil mummy hot dogs.”
- Elizabeth Heiskell recommended that “your kids” should take bites out of those mummy hot dogs (pigs in a blanket) “as long as they don’t have the stomach virus” and coat them in ketchup before serving “like the thing is just a-bleedin’”, so that they look extra disgusting? [See the Clip of the Day]
- Bobby Finger found it absolutely horrific that anyone would put out pre-chewed food at a Halloween party.
- Elizabeth Heiskell said, “Honey, you can order anything online.”
- Megyn Kelly asked how to melt chocolate.
- Elizabeth Heiskell said, “Megyn!!! Do you live under a rock?!”
- Bobby Finger’s opinion of Elizabeth Heiskel did a 180.
- Elizabeth Heiskell said, “Now look! We got some Jell-O shots here. Now I know you’ve done these.”
- Megyn Kelly said, “What is she implying?”
- Elizabeth Heiskell convinced the audience to chant, “Shot! Shot! Shot!” as Megyn took a disgusting eyeball Jell-O shot.
- Megyn Kelly took the Jell-O shot and said, “Ew!”
- Megyn Kelly teased the next segment, about the founder of Drybar.
- Megyn Kelly rolled tape of Alli Webb, the founder of Drybar.
- Alli said, “I know it probably sounds silly ‘cause it’s just blowouts, but it really has impacted women’s lives.”
- Megyn Kelly welcomed Alli to the stage, where she showed off her blowout technique.
- A poor audience member named Sarah had to sit there with a thing covering her face before Alli revealed her new “mai tai” blowout.
- A poor audience member named Merlin revealed her own Drybar transformation.
- Alli said, “You can see from her before that it’s a really nice transformation.”
- Merlin ROLLED HER EYES.
- Another poor audience member named Ashley revealed her “old fashioned” hairstyle.
- Alli said, “I feel like I’m the walking advertisement for an underachiever.”
- Poor Ashley just sat there looking uncomfortable.
- Megyn Kelly said everyone in her studio would receive a Drybar gift card.
- The audience went wild.
- Megyn Kelly said, “Up next... we’ll meet some millennials—I said it, millennials—with a surprising message on how to fail, and that setbacks might be the key to success.”
- Megyn Kelly welcomed Kristen Hadeed and Rachel Simmons, two writers who wrote books about... failing?
- Kristen Hadeed is the founder and CEO of Student Maid, a maid service that “only hires millennials.”
- Bobby Finger checked out of this segment at this point.
- Megyn Kelly welcomed Lee Brice to the stage to perform a song from his latest album.
- Megyn Kelly Today ended.