Meet the Pro-Life Tea Party Congressman Who Pressured His Mistress to Have An Abortion

Right now, you’re going to want to dust off your Horrible Hypocritical Human Garbage Bingo cards; I have a feeling this story could finally be your lucky round. Tennessee Tea Party Congressman Scott DesJarlais, who ran for Congress on a FAMILY VALUES PRO LIFE IN GOD WE TRUST JESUS IS HUGGING AMERICA WITH HIS MEATY WHITE ARMS AMEN platform, pressured his mistress to have an abortion. Oh, and one more thing — the mistress was one of Scott DesJarlais’ patients at the time. Because he was her doctor. BINGO!

Evidence of the affair and coerced abortion were obtained by the Huffington Post, which obtained a transcript of a telephone conversation between DesJarlais and his patient/lover that appears to have been recorded by DesJarlais himself back in 2000. According to the transcript, the future bastion of good old fashioned family values (the kind of family values that DesJarlais likes to fuck in the woodshed after his wife and children are sleeping) was trying to “repair” his marriage. The Congressman has not denied that the contents of the transcript are true, but have accused his opponent of “dirty tricks.”

Seriously. The nerve of them to communicate to a media outlet a completely fucked up, hypocritical thing that Scott DesJarlais did. Shoot that messenger! How dare they characterize dear, sweet Scott DesJarlais as some kind of bullying hypocritical serial philandering immoral monster.

Just to be on the safe side, though, let’s check out some of the transcript of the call, from the Huffington Post.

DesJarlais: You told me you’d have an abortion, and now we’re getting too far along without one. [ED: Following this, DesJarlais hems and haws about why he can’t accompany his pregnant mistress to the abortion he is demanding of her.]
Woman: You told me you would have time to go with me and everything.
DesJarlais: I said, if I could, I would, didn’t I? And I will try. If I can [find] time, you’re saying you still will?
Woman: Yeah.
The two bicker over when they can meet to hash out a solution, and they make clear the nature of their relationship when DesJarlais says delaying a resolution isn’t fair to his wife.
Woman: This is not fair to me. I don’t want you in my life.
DesJarlais: Well, I didn’t want to be in your life either, but you lied to me about something that caused us to be in this situation, and that’s not my fault, that’s yours. .
Woman: Well, it’s [your] fault for sleeping with your patient.

Unsurprisingly, Dr. Love’s attempts to abort his way to marital bliss were unsuccessful, and he and his wife divorced in 2001.

But why, you may ask, is this relevant? This sounds like a personal problem a decade old, and it’s none of our business. To that I’d respond: this wouldn’t be anyone’s business if part of DesJarlais’ entire political thing weren’t getting all up in other people’s bodies and into their bedrooms. When politicians run on “Family Values” platforms, they better make damn sure they actually practice what they preach. If my bedroom is public, well, then — so is yours.