Marie Claire's Ultimate Loungewear Guide Is an Affront to Loungewear

Marie Claire‘s Ultimate Loungewear Guide is an affront to loungewear everywhere. This is the most qualified statement I’ve ever made in my entire life. If being otiose were a nationstate instead of a state of mind, I would be its beloved regent. When I used to work from home, I had three separate bathrobes that I would change into as the day progressed instead of clothing. (My formal Evening Bathrobe was silk and zebra striped, because duh.)

It suffices to say that I know a lot about loungewear. Here are the two main requirements: one, it’s gotta be roomy in your loungewear because you need lounge space, and two, your loungewear must be constituted in such a way that it doesn’t perplex or worry you when you pour nacho bits and/or spaghetti onto yourself. In this way, the Ultimate Lounge Wear is an inexpensive yet comfortable sack.

The Ultimate Loungewear is NOT, as Marie Claire has stated, a $245 faux fur sweatshirt by Tibi and a $970 Massimo Alba cashmere scarf. It is not a pair of $425 slip-on sneakers. It is also not a $695 3.1 Phillip Lim sweatshirt. I think the biggest affront in this shopping guide is the way in which suggested lounge-movies are showcased next all the wildly costly NON-lounge crap. Who on this earth pops in a Breakfast Club DVD and settles into the folds of their designer leather jogging pants ($1,150, by Rebecca Taylor) for a night in? A madman. That’s the only answer. Only a madman does that.