Sex. Celebrity. Politics. With Teeth
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Sex. Celebrity. Politics. With Teeth

Lorde's Uber Driver Gushed About Picking Up a 'Celebrity Passenger' Just Before Her

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Lorde told a brief tale on Twitter Tuesday about how her Uber driver was oblivious to the fact that she was Lorde. The Lorde. The questionably ageless star who’s been driven through dark forces to be friends with Taylor Swift. There are a number of reasons this story should fascinate you.

First, here’s what happened.

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This story should fascinate you because:

  1. Lorde took an Uber. It’s common knowledge that celebrities take Ubers because everyone does. Still, isn’t it interesting to imagine Lorde saying “Uber”? To me, it is.
  1. When you think about it, it’s true that Lorde appears to have a universally unrecognizable celebrity face, unless you’re a teen.
  2. She’s Mom.
  3. The Uber driver spoke to her when he didn’t need to, meaning he’s one of those chatty Uber drivers. Here’s a story: On a recent Uber pool trip, my driver struggled to hold a conversation with me and three other tired, non-conversational people in the car. He kept trying and in my head I was like, “Stop.” It was futile and awkward. That didn’t happen to Lorde.
  4. Lorde, just as you would, felt compelled to tweet this fun story, but rather than simply stating what occurred, she used beautiful, narrative prose.
  5. For example, “Currently busting a nut” is gorgeous Twitter anecdote vernacular.
  6. It’s safe to assume Uber drivers love raving about “celebrity passengers” and likely compare notes with other Uber drivers. Fact: This is how a lot of rumors get started.
  7. The Uber driver used the phrase “celebrity passenger.” In this case, the word “passenger” wasn’t needed to describe the person. He could’ve just said a “celebrity” was in the car and I bet Lorde would’ve understood.
  8. The story leaves you wondering who exactly the celebrity was. Perhaps it also launches you into deep thought about the serendipity of these circumstances. Every time you take an Uber you’ll wonder whether there was a celebrity in that same Uber before you. And if the Uber driver just didn’t mention it to you. And then you’ll wonder, why he didn’t mention it to you? Does he want to keep this secret to himself? Did the Uber driver read Lorde’s tweet and was like, “Oh my god! That was Lorde.” We’ll never know. Unless he tweets about it.