Let's Look at Britney Spears's Instagram for Just One Moment

For the record, I don’t think it’s wise or healthy to read into the things Britney Spears posts on social media in an attempt to glean information or to ferret out the secrets in the code she is using in order to communicate with her fans. Part of me thinks that she is trolling us in some way that is mostly just amusing for her and that the reactions of the faceless strangers who are looking for any sort of meaning in everything she does is what keeps her stomach flat and the waistband of her short shorts low. I don’t know! Let’s see what she’s up to.

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As I was aimlessly scrolling last evening, this post stopped me, if only because of the comments, which are looking for meaning in a way that, to me, feels sad?

The caption, for the record, is “👛💅👙👗⭐️🧚‍♀️👗😹👠👄👿👯👯‍♀️👙👗👡👡🩴👒👒👑👑🐥🐣🦋🦄🙈🐠🐠🐇🐇🐇🕊🕊🌸🌛🌸🌝🌺🌞🌹🍎🍉🍇🫐🍓🍋🌈🥞🥞🍟🥙🥒🌽🍯🍯🍰🍩🍪🍭🍽🏀🥊🥊🛼🛼.” Is this a code? Is this a cipher? Is this a woman who started watching The Swan Princess at the exact moment her edible kicked in and felt like sharing the contents of her brain with her “fans,” who are seemingly interested in her best interests but really only want to “save” her for clout? I don’t know! I’m not Britney Spears. [Instagram]


Once upon a time, noted sex-bench co-owner Ashley Benson was dating is-he-hot-or-just-tall “rapper” G-Eazy. They broke up two months ago and are now back together, I guess. A end-stage-panny miracle!

G-Eazy, whose real name is Gerald, was spotted at Ashley Benson’s house. They got dinner. She rode shotgun in his convertible Ferrari. They have kissed and made up and are now fine.

“Ashley forgave G and they got over their heated argument that happened a month ago,” a source told E! News. “Ashley and G are both obsessed with each other and have a lot of fun together.”

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It is important (?) to note that they are both (?) starring in a “pandemic-inspired slasher movie” called 18 and Over, and so maybe their work on this important film is what pushed them together. Or maybe they got bored of not touching and decided that life was too short to not. And so they’re back! Together. Love. [E! News]


  • Details about Kim and Kanye’s impending divorce, if you are interested: Kanye asked for joint custody of the children and no spousal support. Good luck and god bless to everyone involved. [People]
  • Page Six’s little birds overheard Harvey Weinstein’s legal team talking to their client not about extradition, but about air fryers. [Page Six]
  • I love this hot doctor for Kacey Musgraves, who is also very hot! [Us Weekly]

Senior Writer, Jezebel

DISCUSSION

kittenninja
KittenNinja

Britney is, and always has been, trying to tell us that she is really freaking bad at the internet.