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Let Twitter Be Your Marriage Counselor

Illustration for article titled Let Twitter Be Your Marriage Counselor

One of the grossest words in the English language — "wifey" — is now part of a trending topic on Twitter. After the jump, some examples of what #arealwifey does.

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It's not clear if those weighing in on the topic are fans of the Judy Blume classic, or Kiki Swinson's more recent Wifey books. Regardless, here's how they think "a real wifey" behaves:

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She keeps giving:

MrDickCannon Official #arealwifey doesnt watch porn with her man, she turns the shit off and makes some

And giving:

BobbyJComedy #aRealWifey Would walk Closest to the Curb just in case a Car is coming at 50mph and Die for you... :)

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And giving:

iRockFitties #arealwifey wont mind suckin ur balls too ...

She cooks, of course:

SplashLewinsky #arealwifey will have ur plate ready wen u come in the door

She's hard:

JessicaLaliah #arealwifey KNOWS HOW TO KEEP A HOUSEHOLD IN CHECK. SHE'S THE BOSS AND HER MAN KNOWS IT.

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But also soft:


LLkoolAyOjO #arealwifey will get her hair and nails done every week religiously to look good for her man

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Most of #arealwifey is silly:

AdrianThaHulk Show me #arealwifey and ill show you big foot riding a unicorn

But some of it is serious, and kind of sad:


Lola_Pooh #arealwifey makes sure her husband is happy with her so he doesn't find another woman to fulfill his happiness.

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And of all the tweets, this is my favorite:

MyLifeQuoted #arealwifey doesn't use the term "wifey"

Or maybe this:

katehable If someone called me any form of #arealwifey they would get cut

#arealwifey [Twitter]

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DISCUSSION

madeofawesome--high-priestess-old
madeofawesome, high priestess of the vampire jedi

Can we also declare a vendetta against the word "hubby?" Also, people who call their SO by that person's full name. Ex: If your honey goes by "Will" it is really unnecessary to call him "William." It makes me want to vomit.