I wish there were a way to loosen the death-grip that Kristen Bell and Dax Shepard have on my heart, because I do not appreciate being helpless to the whims of complete strangers, just because they happen to be outwardly adorable. But I cannot help it. THEY JUST LIKE EACH OTHER SO MUCH. And, anyway, apparently they got secret-married and of course it was precious.
The Veronica Mars actress wrote, "Wife coffee tastes way better than regular coffee in the morning :) @daxshepard1"
...According to TMZ, which first broke the news, the couple showed up simply to grab their marriage license but ended up taking the plunge right on the spot. A little spontaneity never hurt anyone!
...The two put wedding planning back on the table after the U.S. Supreme Court declared the federal Defense of Marriage Act unconstitutional earlier this year.
My god, I guess I have secret-wedding fever. [E!]
Apparently a reporter asked Alfonso Cuaron what it was like to shoot a movie in space.
At an Oct. 16 press conference for the film, the journalist, later identified as comedic talk show reporter Carlos Pérez, asks Cuaron in Spanish, "What were the technical and physical difficulties of filming in space?" He continues, "Was it very difficult? Was it complicated to shoot in space? Did the cameramen get dizzy? I don’t know."
Cuaron, who initially scratches his head, ultimately replies in good humor, “Well yeah, we took some cameras to the [spacecraft]." He then calmly continues to embellish his tale: "We were there for three and a half months, right? Three and half months in space."
Meanwhile, Pérez, whose prank spread like wildfire online, took to his Twitter to respond. "Forgive me Twitter for being a professional committed to information," he wrote. "Don't tell me I was the only one who had that doubt."
I'm confused. Was it a real question, because he's "committed to information" and "had that doubt," or was it a "prank," because he's a "comedic talk show reporter"? I don't get it. IS THIS WHAT IT'S LIKE TO READ TABLOIDS IN SPACE!? [Us]
Austin Mahone has been hospitalized with a bloodclot. Austin Mahone is a famous singing teenager popular for having excellent hair. (Seriously. That's what my 11-year-old stepdaughter said when I asked why she likes him. "His hair.")
The 17-year-old singer "was admitted to the hospital with a 104 temperature and is being treated for a blood clot and extreme inflammation in his throat as well as severe dehydration," his rep confirms to Us Weekly.
On Thursday, Oct. 17, Mahone posted an Instagram photo of himself in a hospital gown. "I've never felt so bad," he wrote in the accompanying caption. The "What About Love" singer shared with his so-called "Mahomies" on Twitter earlier this week that he had to reschedule his Miami and Orlando shows.
"Its Doctor’s orders," he tweeted. "I have a bad flu 103 fever and I can’t move. If I could go I would."
Get well soon, Austin Mahone's hair! [Us]
- Apparently Selena Gomez has been named World's Sexiest Stewardess. Like, no offense to Selena, but you guys could have at least called me to let me know I didn't win. I worked really hard on that application. [E!]
- Courtney Stodden would like you to be aware of breast cancer. [HuffPo]
- LOOK AT NATALIE PORTMAN'S BABY MILLIPEDE!!! [E!]
- Kim Kardashian "can't stop" showing off her post-baby body. :-||||||||| [People]
- The entire angle of this Daily Mail article is, "despite butt, brave fat woman somehow not afraid to go outside." (ALSO SHE IS JUST REGULAR-SIZED.) [DailyMail]
- Hahahaaahaahahhaaha, someone stole the camera from Dumb and Dumber To. Everyone's a critic. [TMZ]
- Rose Byrne and Bridesmaids costar Melissa McCarthy will reunite in a Paul Feig-helmed spy comedy called Susan Cooper. Which reminds me. There's something I need to get off my chest. I LIKE GREENWITCH BETTER THAN THE GREY KING THERE I SAID IT. [JustJared]
- HAPPY FRIDAY IT'S CHEESY BREAD TIME I LOVE YOU
Images via Getty.