KFC Customer Commits Assault With a Deadly Cake

A customer at a KFC got really creative when it came to improvised weaponry.

Seattle police say an unknown man walked into a KFC last week, threw a lemon cake at the employees, and left. Thankfully, he missed, sparing the employees potential serious injury or at least having to go get a new shirt, but the danger is all too real. We can laugh, but drive-by cakings are a serious issue. What’s worse, and I swear I’m not making this quote up, the KFC employees complained that they “can no longer sell the cake.”

It’s unclear whether the man brought the cake in with him or picked it up there (it was also unclear to me until just now that KFC actually sold cakes). For me, I’m just desperately curious as to why the dude decided to throw a cake at a bunch of KFC employees. I mean, potentially I get it — I’m mad at the people responsible for the existence of KFC, too. If you’re going to cake someone, though, at least have the stones to direct your attack at an appropriate place: charge into a Yum! Brands board meeting to start slinging confections. It seems only fair.