Screenshot via Daily Mail

With the way they dote on each other when they aren’t scratching each other’s eyes out, it’s amazing to me that severe socialite Jocelyn Wildenstein and her fashion designer paramour Lloyd Klein are not on reality TV. I guess given the massive settlement she received in her divorce from art dealer Alec Wildenstein in 1999 (a reported $2.5 billion), she doesn’t really need the money. What about my needs, though?

For now, there is this DailyMailTV interview, in which Wildenstein doesn’t say very much beyond waxing nostalgic about Brigitte Bardot, whom she’s styled to look like in a photo shoot captured by the Mail’s cameras (for the sake of, it seems...being captured by the Mail’s cameras).

The real notable quotes from the interview come from Klein, who had this to say about his famous fiancée’s famous face:

I don’t understand the whole press and the Catwoman thing because Jocelyn always looked like that.

She never really did anything to change her face. I have pictures from 16 years old where she looks exactly the same as today.

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Here’s a picture of Wildenstein from several lives ago:

Screenshot via Daily Mail

The following passage comes from George Rush’s 20-year-old Vanity Fair article that introduced many of us (including this devoted fan) to the wonder of Wildenstein (who’s referred to throughout as “Jocelyne”):

And then there was the plastic surgery. They’d been married about a year, Alec recalls, when Jocelyne told him his eyes looked baggy. So they went in for his-and-hers eye-lifts, but for Jocelyne it was just the beginning. “She was crazy,” says Alec. “I would always find out last. She was thinking that she could fix her face like a piece of furniture. Skin does not work that way. But she wouldn’t listen.”

“I don’t think I’ve known her when she wasn’t healing from something,” says a friend, who regrets the way Jocelyne has “mutilated herself.”

Over time, Jocelyne created a ritual mask that was vaguely African and so taut that she could barely blink. Friends suspect that she’s trying to look like a jungle cat. “The lynx has perfect eyes,” says Jocelyne, who keeps one as a pet. But she insists her feline look comes naturally. “If I show you pictures of my grandmother,” she says, “what you see is these eyes—cat eyes—and high cheekbones.”

In the past, Jocelyne has claimed that she had the face-lifts because Alec “hates to be with old people.” But now she admits, “He never pushed me. . . . No, he all the time told me that I look very young.” She adds, “Until the day you don’t look young enough!

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The Mail reports that: “According to Jocelyn, she had undergone a surgical procedure that her ex-husband did not approve of, so he went to the press in an alleged attempt to smear her.” Hm.

Additionally Klein says:

Look, Jocelyn is beautiful, she’s magical. The first time I met her, I was almost mesmerized by the beauty, the eyes, the personality. And I work in fashion and I see all these supermodels, and I see everyone, and I see the most beautiful women on the runway, right? But Jocelyn, has something to offer that not a lot of women have.

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Damn straight!