Christopher Plummer, the actor whose career started after his masterful turn as Captain Von Trapp in The Sound of Music, died Friday at 91. Coincidentally, The Sound of Music aired on network television in December of last year, around the week of Christmas, resulting in an inevitability that I think anyone could see coming from a mile away: Thirst Trapp TikTok, which simply acknowledges the fact that Captain Von Trapp was hot.
ThirstTrapp TikTok is not a section of TikTok that I frequent, because I am old enough to have processed my feelings about a young Christopher Plummer’s hotness in real-time, alone, as it should be. However, intrepid TikTok journalist Rebecca Jennings noticed this in December, when The Sound of Music inspired many a young woman on TikTok to thirst for Captain Von Trapp in a way that I find hilarious and also quite charming.
If you are not familiar with Plummer’s early work as a hot Austrian army man, please watch this extremely sensual dance scene between Captain Von Trapp and Maria (Julie Andrews), who is indeed wearing a dress made of curtains she ripped out of her bedroom at the Von Trapp estate, but looks great just the same.
The denizens of ThirstTrapp Tiktok are few and far between, but the field appears to be dominated by this user, @cheerioqueen, who friggin’ loves Captain Von Trapp and isn’t afraid to scream that love from the social media platform of her choice.
I know Maria came into the Von Trapp household as a woman of God, but I don’t know what I would’ve done if I had walked into the very same house and saw stern daddy Von Trapp in his little suit. I understand, of course, that his stern exterior is masking a real and true need for love and intimacy, and that cracking through that tough exterior to his gooey emotional core is a challenge, but the fucking Baroness wasn’t doing that shit, so Maria simply did what she needed to do, okay?
If we’re being completely honest here, it was clear that the Baroness was never the right fit for Captain Von Trapp. Also, I know that attachment theory wasn’t a thing in Nazi-occupied Austria, but I like to think that Maria intuited that ol’ Cappy was clearly operating from a space of avoidant attachment and allowed him the space he needed to explore his own vulnerability, as evidenced by the following clip which is the only time I will allow a man to play an acoustic guitar in my presence.
Normally, if a man were to pick up a guitar and pluck out an earnest rendition of “Edelweiss” anywhere near me, I’d grab my bag, find my jacket, and slip out the back door. Captain Von Trapp is the only exception to this rule.