If You’re Going to Do a ‘Whale Tail,’ Please Do It Right
The 2000s fashion revival is fueled in part by literal teenagers on TikTok.
Style

Every bad fashion trend that has ever existed eventually comes back from the dead, stronger and better than ever, reinvented for “now”, whenever that may be. Currently, those who pay attention to fashion are in the grips of a 2000s revival, fueled in part by literal teenagers on TikTok discovering the joys of their parent’s True Religion jeans and Ed Hardy trucker hats. Elsewhere, millennials who claim to be fearful of Gen Z but are really just scared of irrelevance, have waged war. All these turf wars are mere distractions from the real enemy, riding in on a dark horse with its buttcrack hanging out: the low-rise pant’s best friend, the whale tail.
For the uninitiated, a whale tail describes the top part of a thong that rises out of the back of the low-rise pant of your choice, like the fin of a majestic orca rising out of the vast ocean of your ass. All the lithe, tan starlets of the early 2000s flaunted this trend, parading around Hollywood with their underwear sticking out of the back of their pants. Gillian Anderson wore a backless dress with her thong just fully out and about to the 2001 Vanity Fair Oscar’s afterparty. This look, which includes a pair of tiny purple sunglasses, was a real moment. Unlike Paris Hilton running around Los Angeles with her g-string out for the paparazzi, there’s something less calculated and more “who cares” about Anderson’s choice; the thong isn’t even that nice, and you can still see the tag. I don’t know Gillian Anderson’s mind, but this is effortless in its own way. Though I can’t in good faith support this, I have to respect it. (Notably, Mrs. Hailey Beiber wore an updated version of this dress to the 2019 Met Gala, the theme of which was camp. Perhaps she is the only one who got it right that year.)