Here's How to Make Christmas Cookies When You're Going to Die Alone

Just throw all the fucks you've ever given about that other person into the bowl and stab them with a spatula. Delicious!

[via Smoothiefreak and Akilah Hughes]

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I adore this. However, my single-person cookie recipe goes like this:

- Buy bag of Hershey's chocolate chips.

- Read recipe for chocolate chip cookies on the back of the wrapper.

- Follow instructions for dough mix.

- Eat mix straight from the bowl while watching Netflix until happy. Repeat as needed.