Here Is the True Story of a Man With Two Dicks

By Madeleine Davies | January 2, 2014 | 6:55pm

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It was once written (in the Bible, maybe?) that “two are better than one” and it’s a statement true enough for a lot of things. It’s true for cakes, kittens, Weasley twins, bongo drums, socks and chopsticks, but is it also true for one man with two penises? Apparently, it is — at least according to one individual who has two dicks and totally happens to love it.

“DoubleDickDude” (probably not his legal name) is a man who was born with Diphallia, a rare condition where a male infant is born with two penises. If you want to see photos of what Diphallia looks like on a grown man, DoubleDickDude has provided them and, obviously, they are NSFW. Here they are flaccid and here they are erect.

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Late last night, DoubleDickDude bravely waded into the muddy waters of Reddit to conduct an AMA, which resulted in a Q&A that surprisingly ended up being educational, fascinating and bizarrely uplifting.

Let’s get some of the more obvious questions out of the way immediately. Yes, both dicks are functioning. Yes, both can pee. No, he cannot helicopter them. Yes, he uses them both during sex and both can ejaculate, although he favors the right because it’s more sensitive.

Now, onto the more interesting parts (because apparently we’re already bored with the guy with two wangs). DoubleDickDude, who is bisexual and currently in an exclusive polyamorous relationship with a man and a woman, is — on Reddit at least — is completely and refreshingly comfortable with his condition — so much so that he’s completely grown to love it.

“I was born with it for a reason,” he responded to a question about why neither he nor his parents ever seriously considered having one of his penises removed. “My mom admitted recently she had no idea what that reason was, but it’s there so it stays there. Glad she did, after everything because I really am one in millions. Besides the ego boost, it really makes a person feel special knowing there is likely no one else like you alive right now.”

According to DoubleDickDude, the only time he ever wished he was different was when he was in high school and other boys would make fun of him.

“…It became a joke and guys immediately thought I was gay,” he said. Ah, the sound logic of high school assholes.

You might think that the response from the Reddit community would be along the same lines, but in reality, most of the Redditors just seem excited, curious and even a little envious of DoubleDickDude’s condition.

A lot of questions focused on the reactions of DoubleDickDude’s sexual partners when they first discover his…erm…assets.

His answer:

varies from girl to girl. Some have been like WOW. some have been like THATS FAKE! some have freaked out like, called me names. Most are pretty curious, but i dont have casual sex anymore, i stopped a few years back. Didnt like the empty feeling inside after a 1 night stand. did a lot of those in my late teens. A LOT of them. but for the most part, girls were nervous and some changed their mind at the last minute. dudes NEVER change their mind, they always want it even if they’re freaked out a little. lol

On how he has sex:

Q: seems like a stupid question but when you have sex, can you do all the position, because i guess you must use only one of your penis and the other one must be kind of in the way if its also hard.

A: my bf and gf can take both in them, so it’s pretty standard. but in the past with partners who had smaller or tighter holes, i had to start off using one but by the time i was done i had used both. 😉

Again, it’s pretty refreshing how confident and comfortable DoubleDickDude is with his double dick circumstances and even more so that he’s found partners who are equally down and don’t make him feel fetishized.

But let’s not go out on that sentimental note. Let’s go out with these final poetic thoughts from DoubleDickDude himself:

Thought for the night, I really wanna give James Franco a facial. lol

You down, Franco?

Image via Shutterstock.