Romance. It can start in so many places, in so many different ways. A chance meeting at a favorite restaurant or coffee shop. A shared interest in a local civic project or organization. A casual glance across a crowded room. Or, perhaps, while your wife is in labor, you fall in love with the nurse delivering your baby.

WAIT! Before you run screaming out of the room to bleach your eyes from the words you just read, let me fill you in on all the beautiful, romantic details of this dickish move. In a Jacksonville, NC Craigslist Missed Connection ad, our Romeo pines for the lovely woman who helped his wife bring their child into the world.

This is probably a long shot but you were the nurse taking care of my wife while she was having our baby. I enjoyed our eye contact and would really like to talk to you more. Maybe tomorrow I will be there most of the day and I will bump in to you in the hall way or see you at the nurse station.

Yes, it's probably a "long shot" that you are the type of person who won't become instantly horrified upon learning that the man who she thought was helping his wife through an agonizing labor was actually scopin' out the hotties in the room. I'm sure she'll see through this shitty thing that you've done and fall madly love with you. This will all be a HILARIOUS story you tell your kids someday. (Not the kid you just had with your wife, though. I doubt that kid will ever want to hear this story.)

I'm going to pray heavily to the Gods of the Internet that this is a fake. It has to be. Right? I'd say no one on Earth is actually this stupid, but then again I've been surprised by stupidity so many, many times. If it is fake, the Craigslist troll who wrote this deserves some kind of Internetting Evil Genius medal.

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