Google Interns Party Too Hard for the Olds

Interning at Google is like achieving Nirvana if you’re a tech nerd. Interns get $6,000 a month, free rent, laundry service, meals, a gym membership and a free shuttle service, and that’s all on top of the fact that Google’s offices look like a Spy Kids-themed playground. Yes, all of those years they got bullied for wearing Nintendo shirts in high school finally paid off. Unlike the Liberal Arts Intern who gets paid in Chipotle gift cards (if they’re lucky) the Google Intern is enjoying a cushy, cushy summer.

But unlike years past, this summer’s Google interns at the company’s Silicon Valley Googleplex had the option of living in shared apartments bought by Google at a North San Jose apartment complex called Crescent Village. Trusting that the geeks would stick to doing geeky things when they got together, like have LAN parties or play Settlers of Catan, Google thought creating what is essentially a luxury dorm for their interns was a good idea.

But the well-to-do residents of Crescent Village didn’t know what was happening to their previously pristine complex when throngs of “intelligent” youth descended on the apartments, bringing with them the raucous partying habits from their institutes of higher education. New York Magazine reports that neighbors were confused by the initial move-in: “At first I thought it was summer camp, but then I noticed that the kids were too old,” said a 46-year-old resident of the complex. “They dart out into the middle of the street. They jaywalk all the time. I have to be very careful when I’m driving.” GASP. They jaywalk?! Watch it, dorks! Stay on the sidewalks Google has provided for you!

Aside from jaywalking, the Google interns have been “terrorizing” their neighbors with parties in the middle of the week (!), hosting hot tub gatherings for other tech friends, and drinking in the complex’s pool. Their partying has gotten so out of hand, the apartment complex has issued warnings directed specifically at the Google interns, and several residents have taken to Yelp to complain.

Good for you, kids. Before receiving an inevitable corporate scolding, I want to congratulate you on being able to party like us normals. Now, go back to your bouncy ball desk chair and make me a better Gmail.