Now that Dorinda Medley has been released from Andy Cohen’s golden clutches and departed The Real Housewives of New York, what will happen to her nice-ass apartment that she has reportedly been living in for free?!
According to Page Six, Medley signed a contract in 2017 with the Oriana Building to live in a $10,000/month apartment rent-free while she appeared on the show, while also, somehow, making $10,000 a month. In exchange for free rent, Dorinda threw parties at her house and let a TV crew all up in her space—a nice symbiotic arrangement for a woman who is now attempting to retreat out of the public eye and back into regular-ass personhood. However, now that Dorinda’s making her way back to becoming a regular human being again, what’s going to happen to her apartment?! Where will she live!! Dorinda... I’m worried?
Actually, no, just kidding, I’m fucking not. Ha! Dorinda is going to be fine. The long tail of fame that will follow Ms. Medley after her time clutching the golden apple will be lucrative, I’m sure! It’d be great if Dorinda spent some time considering her drinking and its impact on herself, her friends, and her loved ones, and took a moment for herself. Maybe a spa month where she explores qi gong and emerges a new woman, followed by a life sponsorship deal with a turmeric latte/kombucha sparkling beverage that doesn’t yet exist. Imagining Medley pivoting to enlightenment influencer is a pleasant exercise for a Friday morning in hell. Try it, you’ll love it. [Page Six]
Now that we all know Brad Pitt has been dating Nicole Poturalski, a hot German model some 20 years his senior, as the final act in his Famous Man Midlife Crisis, more dribbles of speculation are springing forth from the poisoned well that is the celebrity gossip machine. My bible, Page Six, informs me that Pitt was spotted at a Kanye West concert with Poturalski in November and Alia Shawkat was also there. Hm! Interesting!!
Shawkat and Pitt have spent a lot of time together in recent months, so much so that Shawkat had to come out and say that they’re just friends and nothing more. That much is clear now because she seemed to be serving some sort of purpose as the relationship beard for Pitt’s burgeoning love with this German woman? Am I connecting the dots to make up a story that works for me because this column requires it? Possibly. But am I right?? Probably, bitch! [Page Six]
- Love is alive: Liam Payne is engaged to a fan, Maya Henry. [People]
- Love is alive, but I wish it weren’t: Marques Houston, 39, married Miya Dickey, 19, a woman whom he started “dating” juuuust after she turned 18. [Love B. Scott]
- Surprise! Barbara Walters made Sherri Shepherd cry like all the time when they worked together. [People]