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Donald Trump's Campaign Has Somehow Spent More Money on Hats Than Polling

Photo of a tremendous waste of money via screen grab
Photo of a tremendous waste of money via screen grab

When you consider just how ill-informed flatulent butternut squash Donald Trump’s campaign is, this bewildering fact makes a lot of sense.


The Washington Post reports that according to Federal Election Commission filings, the Trump campaign has spent $1.8 million on polling from June 2015 to September of this year. They have spent an astonishing $3.2 million on hats.

Hats. Dumb hats that say “Make America Great Again,” in camo and black and white and red, with the American flag emblazoned on them, sold to Trump supporters and some people somewhere that might wear them as an attempt at irony.


The hats are rolled up into collateral, a category that includes signs, shirts and other merchandise, for a grand total of $15. 3 million spent on stuff that is basically what you’d buy at a merch table at a concert. Nothing about this campaign has been traditional in any sense, but these numbers make that exceedingly clear.

From the Post:

Most candidates dream of seeing people clamoring for shirts and signs bearing their name or campaign message, but only a select few actually engender that kind of interest. Donald Trump did, and the force of celebrity that made his hats hot items also powered him to a plurality of the vote against a wide field of Republican opponents.

You’d think that for the kind of brand visibility Trump has right now, he’d been pouring dollars into advertising, but he’s merely ridden the wave of his dubious celebrity to clinch the nomination, in spite of it all. Despite Kellyanne Conway’s attempts to craft Trump’s campaign into one that actually resembles a presidential campaign with polling and facts and research — all tactics that would have made it abundantly clear that he is not fit to serve as president – it seems she was too late. The hats secured him the nomination. It was the hats.

Senior Writer, Jezebel

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I’ve been so tempted to buy some of the riffs on this that have come out recently but then I realize people won’t get close enough to read it and will make assumptions about my intelligence.