Donald Trump Will Bring President Obama's Half-Brother Malik To the Final Presidential Debate

By Megan Reynolds  |  October 19, 2016 | 2:05am
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Tomorrow marks the final time Hillary Clinton and inflamed anal gland Donald Trump face off in the presidential debate thunder dome before the general election. As tradition dictates, each candidate will be bringing a surprise guest. Last time, Trump brought the women who had accused Bill Clinton of rape. This time, he’s bringing Malik Obama, Trump supporter and President Obama’s half-brother.

“I’m excited to be at the debate,” Obama told Page Six. “Trump can make America great again.” Regarding his esteemed guest, Trump told the Post, “I look very much forward to meeting and being with Malik. He gets it far better than his brother.”

Okay, sure. But why Malik? Surely Trump understands that Hillary Clinton is the one running for President and President Obama, having served two terms already, is not. Malik’s presence at the debate won’t do shit to rattle Hillary, but is instead a strange dig at the sitting president whose presence has no actual bearing on the election results, except as a citizen who will most certainly vote on November 8.

Malik and the president have a relationship that’s strained at best. The two last saw each other during President Obama’s visit to Kenya in 2015. “I went to the White House to say hello. I paid a courtesy call,” Malik told Page Six. “As usual, it was a hands-off kind of thing, very businesslike, very formal.”

Hmm. Interesting tactic, using the jealousy of a half-brother. Very Trumpy. Super Trumpy. But maybe it’s in reaction to this, from a joint news conference with Italian Prime Minister Matteo Renzi earlier this afternoon. From the New York Times:

“I have never seen, in my lifetime or in modern political history, any presidential candidate trying to discredit the elections and the election process before votes have even taken place…
“You start whining before the game’s even over? If, whenever things are going badly for you…you start blaming somebody else, then you don’t have what it takes to be in this job,”
“I’d advise Mr. Trump to stop whining and go make his case to get votes.”

Trump’s most recent claims that the election process in America is “rigged” is clearly the work of a man flailing desperately against failure and embarrassment. The debate is tomorrow night. Should be a good time!

 
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