Courtney Stodden's Momager Proudly Declares Her Daughter The Next Anna Nicole Smith

Throughout the bizarre story of the Child Bride and her much-older husband, many of us have cried, “But what about her mother?” Well, now that Courtney Stodden’s mom/publicist Krista Keller has opened up to The Daily Beast, you don’t have to wonder anymore. She very much likes her daughter’s current relationship.

But how can that possibly be, you ask? From the very beginning, she thought Doug’s “beautiful, loving, non-sexual” perusal of 16-year-old Courtney was “very admirable” because it started out platonically. But when Doug decided he wanted to make this child his bride, he called Keller and was upfront about his intentions:

“I could really tell my daughter had the kind of love when you want to marry a man or be with a man. Even though she was just 16, I knew it was going to take a pretty big man to handle her because of her sexuality and because of the attention she gets.”

I see. So Courtney’s mother doesn’t worry about her daughter dressing promiscuously — so long as she has a “pretty big man” to handle it? Fine, I’ll bite. But why wouldn’t Keller suggest that her daughter wait a few years before getting hitched?

“These people that say, ‘You could have waited,’ I really don’t understand this way of thinking. Why do parents think that kids need to have those teen years spent going out with different boys, going out in different cars, going out on the beach together alone? There’s a lot of bad stuff that happens in those teen years. They end up being killed in car crashes due to driving with people that have been drinking. Oh, but they’re gonna have their teen years. My daughter is safe. I know where my daughter is.”

Clearly, the risk of getting into a car crash is much higher if you’re a teenager driving around with other teens as opposed to, say, driving around town with her half-century-old sugar daddy, with paparazzi trailing them. And don’t even think for a second that Courtney Stodden or her “momager” give a shit whether you like her or not. Unless you’re gay, in which case, you’re her target audience:

“The gay community has been so loving to her. I know that Anna Nicole Smith had a great rapport with the gay community, and I think they’ve been waiting to have someone they can connect with, and I think Courtney is that person. She is different and stands out. Frankly, we thought she’d fit in better in Hollywood.”

So, there you have it. We can stop worrying about Courtney Stodden because her mother, of all people, isn’t at all worried about Courtney Stodden. Plus, her mother believes that Courtney will be the next Anna Nicole Smith, which also isn’t any cause for concern because look how her life turned out. Exactly.