Company Hacks and Slashes At Model's Body in Quest for Perfection

And they got it so, so wrong.

If you’re going to photoshop a model to high hell (circles 1-3) then you should probably spend some money and get someone who is both familiar with the human body and able to work in a careful and precise manner. And maybe give them some time to do whatever they’re doing, otherwise the hideous $10 dress you’re peddling on Amazon (and Amazon Smile —WTF is Amazon Smile?) will never sell to anyone who has something resembling a human body.

The Gloss reports that the clothing company responsible for the embarrassment of words that make up the name “Zeagoo Womens Bandage Dress Bodycon Dress One Shoulder Dresses “has done some shady things to their model’s body in the name of beauty. And according to them, it’s not just bad photoshop that’s the problem; the dress is unwearable as well.* Regardless, it’s clear there’s something going on.

While the model is a very pretty lady, the company apparently decided she needed more curves, as well as a bit of angular jutting out at the hips:

On the bright side, she kind of looks like a Sim, or perhaps one of the characters in N64 Goldeneye. On the not-so-bright side, she does not even look like a human being anymore because this is simply not what human beings look like.

The Gloss doesn’t mention that the model’s arm looks like it’s a tragic victim of the blur tool, nor that the photos look like they’ve been haplessly cut out from magazines. This takes me back to high school when my friend Jukey and I would make these hideous inspiration collages full of Tori Amos pictures and Sarah Michelle Gellar quotes.

Do better, clothing companies! Do better!

*Full self-disclosure: I know nothing about fashion and wear one outfit (jeans, black shirt) every day. I had to ask a fellow Jezebel writer for confirmation of The Gloss’s claim and her response was “I would never wear this dress.” #reporting.