Comment Of The Day: Gay Men Have A Tell-Tale Fart

According to the “Is Your Son Gay?” app, one of the signs that your boy is into other boys is if he’s “discreet” (as people who actually speak French have pointed out, a better translation is “private” or “prudish”). SorciaMacnasty:Evil Genius says:

“He is discreet?”

ABOUT WHAT?! His interest in making sweet sweet man love? His desire to punch a kitten in the face? His plot to throttle you, his homophobic mother, with old newspapers? What?!

Discretion, I thought, was the better part of valor, not heterosexuality.

Leucadia responds:

It’s about farting. It’s a well-known fact that gay men never rip huge noisy farts, and especially don’t gleefully claim ownership. They gaily mince off to the toilet to toot.

Also: if you are a woman, and if you’ve ever been sitting down and farted and the fart sort of bubbles up through your labia in the front, you’re gay. True facts.

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