Coca-Cola Knows Your Lady Hands Are Weak and in Need of a Man

Have you ever had a really hard time opening a bottle of Coke and some guy helped you out and then you two got married?! Ha, such a classic meet-cute. (It happened to me last week, but we’re divorced now that I’m no longer thirsty for a Coke.)

It’s really hard to meet someone new in China and, as a result, it’s difficult to satisfy the culture’s expectations of marriage. So Coca-Cola, Coke, whatever, came to the rescue by placing a vending machine in Shanghai’s most romantic park. These vending machines were equipped with Coke bottles that were super hard to open. So any weakling female that wanted to quench her thirst would need the help of the manly men to open these bottles. And then sparks would fly between these two opposite-sex people. MARRIAGE PROBLEM SOLVED. You can all go home and make babies, now.

Anyone can clearly see there are some gender issues here. I’m not sure if I’m annoyed that Coca-Cola assumes that a woman’s hands are weak, or that she needs a man for such a basic chore. And the company could have taken a more innovative route to unnecessary match-making, like, I dunno, design a cap that can only be opened with another bottle cap. That way, we’re all equals in the Coke-opening-thing.

I will say that the company has done some cooler-ish marketing campaigns in the past. Coca-Cola has viral vidoes that show vending machines and trucks spreading “happiness,” “love,” and literally food, musical instruments, concert tickets and of course a lot of Coke in the process. They even got couples to kiss each other for free bottles. These campaigns were fun to watch (and genius, from a marketing standpoint); they made every bottle of Coke seem like it was full of giggles and joy and unicorns.

But taking advantage of a woman’s “inherent” weakness, and taking credit for launching a few romances is just ugh. What’s worse is that I would probably be one of those women struggling with the cap. I’d a saw the cap off if I had to, I don’t care, tight caps are one of the most annoying things in the world. Sometimes I try so hard to open a jar or bottle or box that I start menstruating on the spot two weeks before my scheduled date. And it only makes me more frustrated to see guys do it so easily.

Coca-Cola Sneakily Sells Tight-Capped Bottles to Match-Make Couples [Design Taxi]