Coachella is better known for its #corporate #sponsorships than its barrier-breaking celebrity fashion, but this year the relentless boho vibe seems to have been shaken off somewhat and replaced by something... not bad, overall? Like, some of it was cute. In my opinion.
First, let’s get it over with—here are some Victoria’s Secret models who will be dressing exactly like this at music festivals until they are dead. As a side note, I would like to announce that I’m really not into this “hi neck” top trend, currently seen on every other bikini top. Who does this look good on? I would argue that it does not even look good on our friend on the far-right.
Moving along! On the left, Jaden Smith has a nice pink and blue color scheme going on while his new girlfriend Odessa Adlon does an exaggerated ‘90s thing that seems like it must have been difficult to drag around. On the right, Shaun Ross is both neon and understated. And in the middle, my friends, I give you Vanessa Hudgens, crown princess of Coachella. I have no idea what she is doing here! Do you? Can someone explain?
Halsey wears a see-thru bikini top, pink hair, futuristic sneaks, and pants that are either stupid or very cool, I can’t decide. Amber Rose rocks a form-fitting two-piece covered in paper doll accessories, while Sofia Richie—who is a regular at these sorts of things, and a teen, and Justin Bieber’s ex, in case you aren’t in the loop—continues the bikini top trend, pairing a ski bunny look with a Louis Vuitton fanny pack.
There she is again—my Vanessa! Her serene yet rigid commitment to wearing bad outfits is legitimately inspiring. Selena Gomez looks cute, while her new boyfriend The Weeknd follows close behind in matching sunglasses that are very Britney Spears circa 2001. Jhené Aiko is also doing a bralette, this one paired with oversized comfy pants and a yellow top.
And Rihanna did it again:
Nobody does the “undone” look better than Rihanna, who always seems to be sort of half-draped in something incredible and unimaginably expensive. And look at those toes!!
Here are some more very hit-or-miss pics for your perusal, via Instagram:
You can’t see in the Instagram above, but I just received an email from a PR professional informing me that at this exact moment Katy Perry is holding a bottle of Sparkling Ice Essence of Lemon Lime. Here are all the flavors of Sparkling Ice, according to this person: “Black Raspberry, Orange Mango, Pink Grapefruit, Kiwi Strawberry, Coconut Pineapple, Pomegranate Blueberry, Peach Nectarine, Lemon Lime, Crisp Apple, Cherry Limeade, Strawberry Watermelon, Black Cherry and Grape Raspberry.”
Happy Coachella.
Update: The first name of the PR professional in question has been redacted upon request.
DISCUSSION
Also, let us take a moment to appreciate whatever is happening here: