I, too, greet all of my friends in this manner.
Here’s all the shit we couldn’t cover today:
- Here’s Mike Pence, just continuing the grand American tradition of destabilizing Latin America and posing for awkward photos. [CNN/Twitter]
Taylor Lautner Doesn’t Even Remember Saying ‘Bella! Where the Hell Have You Been Loca?’
- The White House is forming a working group of “scientists” to cast doubt on the impacts of climate change. Great!! [Washington Post]
- In a speech on Sunday, Virginia Lieutenant Governor Justin Fairfax compared the scrutiny he is under after two women alleged he sexually assaulted them in the past to “terror lynchings.” Never a good look when you sound like Clarence Thomas. [Washington Post]
- Some good news: the CEO of U.S. gun manufacturer Sig Sauer may go to prison in Germany. [NPR]
- Some more good news: Elizabeth Warren will not be holding private fundraisers with wealthy donors. [New York Times]
- Some news that makes me want to claw my eyes out: former Hillary Clinton campaign staffers are trashing Bernie Sanders’s requests for private planes when he campaigned for Clinton in 2016. His travel cost $100,000, a drop in the bucket when compared to the $15.9 million overall that the campaign spent on private jet travel. Can we not do this??? [Politico]
- Some idiotic news: a Fox News host described Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s decision to pay entry-level staffers a decent salary as “socialism and communism on display.” Hello, please brush up on your Marx! [Slate]
Here are some tweets the president was allowed to publish:
This has been Barf Bag.