Illustration for article titled Can I Please Smoke Weed and Drink Champagne With Rihanna Now?
Screenshot: Instagram

As a surprise to absolutely no one, social distancing with Rihanna looks like a total fucking blast, and I would very much like to find myself locked in a mansion with her drinking champagne and smoking week for the foreseeable future. Unfortunately, because I am me and not someone who is actually friends with Rihanna, that doesn’t really seem feasible for me at this current juncture of my life.

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However, I got as close as I’ll probably ever get Friday night when Rihanna went live with DJs Kitty Ca$h, Pedro, and Stretch Armstrong, along with rappers Octavian and Lil Uzi Vert on Fenty’s Instagram for Fenty Social Club, just one of the many, many, many, many, many Instagram parties that have popped up in recent weeks. Unlike others, which have been just fine, this one had Rihanna and so naturally, it was superior.

Rihanna’s already done quite a bit more than most celebrities when it comes to covid-19 relief, and popping in and out of the DJ sets and performances Friday night was just her lastest act of benevolence, providing the rest of us with a little something to bop to and a little something to laugh at.

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It’s honestly incredible that, regardless of who you are, literally no one can figure out how to work Instagram live — the sound froze, the picture froze, half the time you couldn’t hear Ri talking (except for when she dropped my favorite quote of the evening, “If any of you ask me when the album is dropping while I’m trying to save the damn world” she said before yelling “BLOCKED!” a few times moments later), as it turns out technology will continue to be our great equalizer.

The definite highlight of the stream was watching Rihanna attempt to Futsal Shuffle with Lil Uzi Vert, eventually just contenting herself with smoking what appeared to be a delightful little blunt, and trying on different pairs of Fenty sunglasses, which we were told several times by deputy creative director of Fenty, Jahleel Weaver, would be dropping in May. Apparently, Fenty will be doing more of these in the near future, and I look forward to being better prepared next time, with probably much worse weed and definitely much cheaper champagne than Rihanna was enjoying, but aligning my experience nonetheless to pretend I’m right there with her. [Instagram]


Jamie Dornan would like you to know that he knows the ‘Imagine’ video was tone-deaf, but it’s not his fault! Blame Kristen Wiig! Or Gal Gadot! Or, as Dornan’s doing, blame both Kristen Wiig and Gal Gadot!

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On a recent episode of the podcast Tea With Me, Dornan broke down just how he got roped into singing some John Lennon lyrics from his toilet. Apparently, after he and Wiig shot a movie together this past summer he said he would “do anything for her,” and so, when she reached out about Gadot’s spirit-lifting sonic endeavor, he just said yes.

“I’ll tell you what the problem was,” Dornan said, “I literally did mine in the toilet of my house. Quite clearly, some people had escaped to their second home. There’s too much acreage in the background, too many beautiful trees swaying in the background, clearly in front of an ocean, that sort of craic.”

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Glad to know that Dornan thought he was going to make this video relatable to the rest of us by filming his bit on the shitter, but even if the other folks in the montage had taken their cue from him, I don’t necessarily think that would have made it any better. If celebrities are interested in how to help, please feel free to see the Rihanna section above, try donating a bunch of money to relief efforts and then just vibing on the internet — I think Dornan can still do all that from his bathroom, no? [Pop Crave]


Please enjoy this bonus video of Rihanna going live on her own account on accident, as opposed to Fenty’s. Celebrities, they’re just like us! (Except Rihanna who is actually much cooler and far more beautiful.)

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  • Ashley Graham was body-shamed by another model after her Sports Illustrated cover [Page Six]
  • How much would you pay for a thank you card written by Princess Diana? [People]
  • Look out Bon Appetit, the Hadid sisters are cooking! [Page Six]
  • Thank you, Justin Bieber, for acknowledging us, now please stop going live [Just Jared]

freelance writer living in San Francisco. Please clap.

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