Tiffany Haddish’s ever-growing Fuck List, a roster bounded only by how far you can dream while defying sexual constructs previously existed peacefully with Brad Pitt and Stephen Colbert (which, okay, because his National Anthem performance was not exactly sexy, but I could see the leap). But all logic ruptured last night on Jimmy Kimmel Live when she added...Le...O..Nard..O...Oh...No...
In case you didn’t catch it, she has told this story as a “joke” before, and then to The Hollywood Reporter earlier this week, ha ha, very funny! But last night, she retold the tale. And then she turned to the camera and said, “call me.”
Just as America recovers from reeling over the “who bit Beyoncé” saga of spring, Haddish is, by sheer will and perseverance, insisting that America search deep inside its soul: What is hot? What is not? The gossip industry fundamentally operates upon these consensuses. Thankfully there is some historical basis for adjusting the hotness continuum, as DiCaprio was granted a brief grace period around 2015 when Rihanna thought about it or maybe didn’t, at which point E! Online described their relationship as “sexy.”
Tiffany went on to once again specify that she’ll only do it if he’s in character as Arnie from What’s Eating Gilbert Grape to reward his performance which almost got an Oscar.
But being cemented in Haddish lore is history-making in itself.