British Dude Tries to Sell Girlfriend on eBay ‘As a Joke’

For all the strides the internet has made in its relatively short history, it’s still primarily a bazaar populated by exclusively basement-dwelling people selling mostly useless crap, illicit crap, or actual crap crap. And the occasional human being, which, according to eBay’s official policy, is forbidden.

Shaun Coles, a British dude from Northamptonshire, attracted a small storm of internet scrutiny this week when an extended joke about selling his girlfriend on eBay got so out of hand that he started receiving actual bids from real people who totally believe that one can purchase a human being on the internet. According to the Daily Dot, Coles’s attempt to sell his girlfriend on eBay attracted serious (we can only surmise) bids maxing out at at $1,180, as well as a friendly reminder from eBay that it does not condone the selling of people.

From the Dot:

Coles reportedly described his girlfriend of six years, Debbie Moran, as an “old woman,” complained about her inability to do housework, and used an unflattering photo as part of the joke. It shows her sprawled on the couch in leggings checking the computer next to what seems to be a pile of trash.

“In all seriousness, I wouldn’t sell her for anything,” Coles insisted on ITV.

Moran wasn’t thrilled about the joke (or the photo that Coles used, or the way he described her as “an old woman”), but she seems fine with it now…I guess? After receiving 50 real bids, the posting was removed from eBay and Coles got to go on TV and explain how contrite he is and how under no circumstances would he part with his girlfriend now.