Brilliant Boy Looks Strong, Handsome in Big Fire Truck

By Ellie Shechet  |  July 17, 2017 | 8:25pm
Politics

Today, Donald Trump made the most of his position as leader of the free world and parked his behind in the driver’s seat of a large fire truck, providing his tiny fish brain with a fun distraction and the rest of us with a poetic visual interpretation of the term “emergency.”

The last time the president sat in a truck and pretended to drive it for no good reason—a mere four months ago—Trump wore an “I Love Trucks” button and made several different big boy truck faces. This time, the vice president got in on the fun, looking as much like an inanimate object as a person has ever looked.

They also walked past a big yellow thing, cool:

And here’s Trump in the truck again from a different, much more personally devastating angle:

Later, Trump went on to proclaim a baseball bat “beautiful!”

And afterwards, accompanied by another classic symbol of American masculinity, Trump once again appeared totally natural and not at all like a confused orange snowman:

What a day! The president’s playtime took place as a part of “Made In America Week,” a concept that is funny for several reasons, one underlined this morning by George W. Bush’s ethics lawyer:

But “Made In America Week,” like every week of the Trump presidency, does not seem to involve a particularly jam-packed schedule for the president himself, as relayed by a three-sentence itinerary in this morning’s pool report:

In the morning, President Donald J. Trump will receive his daily intelligence briefing. In the afternoon, the President will have lunch with Vice President Mike Pence. The President will then meet with Secretary of State Rex Tillerson. Later in the afternoon, the President will participate in a Made in America product showcase.

Five minutes of boring stuff, lunch with his friend, talk to his other friend, sit in a truck, pose for pictures… it’s the last day of second grade, baby, and Donnie’s gonna seize the day. Vroom, vroom!

 
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