"Where's my hoverboard," am I right, guys? One thing that Back to the Future II definitely got wrong about 2015 is how many miniature turds of internet content we would poop out about it, resulting in an expanded space-time #ContentUniverse in which the comparison of the actual 2015 present with a fictional 2015 reality intended to please 12-year-olds is forced—though the comparison is obviously meaningless—to be fruitful and multiply.

Look at all of this. Look how fruitful, look how multiply, and it's only January 2! Imagine how annoying everyone will be on October 21, 2015, which is the actual "Back to the Future Day." There's really nothing to talk about: we don't have hover boards because life doesn't work out like the worst movie in a solid trilogy whose purpose was pure childlike entertainment; we don't have self-lacing shoes because designers tried for about one second and then were like "I'm sleep." To the god of unoriginality, we bow our heads and pray.

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And another one from BuzzFeed:

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And, why not, one more:

"But wait," she said, crying gently. "There's more."

From the New York Daily News: "These are the 2015 predictions that 'Back to the Future 2' got right, wrong"

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From E! Online: "Back to the Future Part II Showed Us 2015 First: 11 Things the Movie 'predicted' for the New Year" (32k Facebook likes)

From the Daily Mail: "So just how many predictions did Back to the Future II get right?"

From the Sydney Morning Herald: "What Back to the Future II got right and wrong about 2015"

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From MTV: "7 Things 'Back to the Future: Part II' Told Us 2015 Would Be Like"

From the Telegraph: "7 Things Back to the Future Predicted for 2015"

From Bustle: "The Back to the Future II Year Is Finally Here, Futurists Determine How Close Are We to the Movie's Portrayal of 2015"

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Futurists Determine How Close Are We.

I, being a well-known futurist myself, would like to determine how close are we for a second. We are very close, it seems, to the future being a bad party themed "Where's My Hoverboard" populated with low-rent magicians trying to create meaning from dust.

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Image via Universal Pictures.