At Least Two Subway Riders Have Been Arrested for Man-Spreading

First they came for the man-spreaders and I said nothing…

Buried in the pages of the Police Reform Organizing Project’s recent “That’s How They Get You” report, Gothamist unearthed this little gem:

On a recent visit to the arraignment part in Brooklyn’s criminal court, PROP volunteers observed that police officers had arrested two Latino men on the charge of “man spreading” on the subway, presumably because they were taking up more than one seat and therefore inconveniencing other riders. Before issuing an [adjournment contemplating dismissal] for both men, the judge expressed her skepticism about the charge because of the time of the arrests: “12:11AM, I can’t believe there were many people on the subway.”

That’s right. The police arrested two men for the crime of man-spreading, i.e. taking up too much room on the subway by spreading their legs wide in order to accommodate what we can only assume are their massively large balls.

As a vocal opponent of manspreading, I was thrilled when the Metropolitan Transit Authority began speaking out against it and even more thrilled when some men, #NotAllMen, began having a very public tantrum about their right to take up as much space as their bait and tackle desire.

But now I have to ask myself: Is this too far? Also, who do I hate more? Manspreaders or the NYPD? Answer: I hate them both and yes, this is too far. Basic rudeness isn’t exactly a criminal offense and if it was, the MTA would have the police arresting people for anything ranging from taking up a seat with their purse to playing music on their phone speakers to eating food that makes the entire subway car reek.

Let’s battle this the way we always have—by demanding that man-spreaders move to let you sit. Trust me. I did it this morning and it felt great.