Darlings, the Absolutely Fabulous movie premiere has finally arrived, and it is eccentric city! I hardly know who most of these people are, but I don’t care, because they’re all wearing weird, slightly ill-fitting outfits, and when do you even get that anymore in the day of the celebrity stylist?! What a relief!
Long Live Eddie and Patsy, patron saints of bizarre clothing choices.
AbFab stars Joanna Lumley and Jennifer Saunders are looking gorgeous and fun and a little bit batty, as is entirely appropriate for the occasion. Joanna Lumley is 70, y’all!! May we all be so fucking hot and cool!! Julia Sawolha, who plays Eddie’s long-suffering daughter Saffron Monsoon, could have gone for a slightly more mature silhouette but the sparkles are fun; director Mandie Fletcher, who normally seems to prefer a more subdued look, was a good sport and threw on some silver—I just wish someone had helped her out with this pant situation.
A lot of bright patterns, as is only fitting! Dawn French, actress and Jennifer Saunders’ comedy writing partner, is giving us some kind of insane but joyous floral smock lewk; former Spice Girl Emma Bunton is in a fun patterned mullet dress—Baby Spice, in keeping with her name, has not appeared to age—while actress Jane Horrocks, who plays Eddie’s dense personal assistant Bubble, kills it in a pink and green jumpsuit and silver hair. Legendary English fashion designer Zandra Rhodes, accompanied by an unnamed tall person, is floaty and vibrant in a blue and gold caftan and sensible flats.
Silvery hues: model Daisy Lowe in a zig-zaggy off-the-shoulder gown; model Lily Cole is wearing a fairly unflattering sheer thing with what appears to be bike shorts underneath; British artist Miss Pandemonia, who poses as a human blow-up doll around the London fashion scene, looks right at home; ah, glad to see beautiful newlyweds Jerry Hall and Rupert Murdoch, the latter having evidently taken a brief recess from destroying the world.
Minis galore: model Abigail Clancy has chosen to don one of the worst belts I’ve ever seen, but I guess any awful outfit on this particular carpet is saved by the notion that Eddie would absolutely wear it; Bip Ling, who Google tells me is a “blogger, DJ, and artist,” is kind of selling me on this getup, and appears to have made up her own language??; Jourdan Dunn’s dress is fine, although the tail is dumb IMO; Stella McCartney and Kate Moss are looking more polished than most, although Kate Moss appears to be preparing to enter the boardroom.
Some nice solid colors: actress Celia Imrie works a glamorous stole; not sure who George Shelley and Lilah Parsons are, exactly, but I like her floaty jumpsuit; DJ/filmmaker Josh Quinton and fashion designer Pam Hogg look amazing; Kylie Minogue plays it safe, if nice, in a red halter dress.
Carrie Fisher brought her dog!
Singer-songwriter Ella Eyre is in a nice stripey dress that would look cooler if her lipstick didn’t match her bag; some person named Jade Parfitt—evidently a British model and presenter—is wearing my favorite dress of the evening (although is desperately in need of different shoes), it is very Angelina Jolie as Grendel’s mother; TV presenter Judith Chalmers is excellent in solid red; musician Tinie Tempah is in maybe one of my favorite things I’ve seen a man wear, I’m obsessed with the color of his pants.
And lastly, some of the remaining and very chic dudes: designer Henry Holland in a nice asymmetrical getup, the one and only Jean Paul Gaultier rocking a very patriotic shirt, and designer Joshua Kane and pal in a charcoal-patterned suit and elaborate facial hair situation.
That’s all we’ve got—ta ta for now!
Images via Getty.