All Hail the Thelma & Louise of Dessert Thievery

Illustration for article titled All Hail the Thelma & Louise of Dessert Thievery
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Across the country, two reckless grocery store dessert thieves walk among us, unaware that the other is perhaps their soul mate.

In Texas, the AP reports that a woman was banned from Walmart after eating half a cake while walking around the store, then refusing to pay for it, saying she had found the cake that way. She was subsequently banned from the store. Then, WPIX 11 reports, Blue Bell ice cream issued a statement that they were working with law enforcement to find a woman who took a video of herself taking the lid off an ice cream container, licking the top, and putting it back on the shelf. “Food safety is a top priority, and we work hard to provide a safe product and maintain the highest level of confidence from our consumers,” the company wrote in a statement.

Now all these two women have to do is find each other and maybe call the woman found drinking wine in a Pringles can at a Walmart a few months ago for a girl’s night out stealing grocery store snacks.

Pop Culture Reporter, Jezebel

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In the linked story, it’s not that the woman refused to pay for the cake, it’s that she refused to pay full price, and she wasn’t discovered wandering the store, she actually took the cake up to the checkout counter.

I find that incredibly amusing. Imagine walking up to the cashier and saying “Hey, I found this half-eaten cake, and I want to purchase it (this cake which someone else has been snacking on), but I only want to pay for the uneaten part.” They could mass the partially eaten cake and an uneaten cake to figure out exactly how much she owed.