Adele Doesn't Care About Her Weight and Probably Has Better Sex Than You

Illustration for article titled Adele Doesnt Care About Her Weight and Probably Has Better Sex Than You

While Adele is OK with her weight, occasionally the Internet is not. "I read a comment on YouTube that I thought would upset me — ‘Test pilot for pies' — but I've always been fine with it. I would only lose weight if it affected my health or sex life, which it doesn't." Shit, yes. You can't help but wonder what Adele's reaction would be to Lady Gaga bringing her weight up in that sort of—can I say it?—well, sorta whiny way in response to her own weight-shaming by the media ("Adele is bigger than me — how come nobody says anything about it?" asked Gaga, then going on to praise Adele's confidence). Naturally, Adele's too classy to respond to that a public forum. She's so classy we don't even know her kid's name.


Also: Really? "Test pilot for pies"? Way to go on that burn, you dumb troll. [The Sun]


Some things Rihanna did:

  • Donated 1,000 sleeping bags to Sandy victims, will hold a hurricane fundraiser party for her new album at Jay-Z's 40/40 Club. [NYDN]
  • Said that choosing to duet on "Nobodies Business" with Chris Brown is nobody's business. [Digital Spy]
  • Played grab-ass with a Victoria's Secret model on the runway. [Us Weekly]

Illustration for article titled Adele Doesnt Care About Her Weight and Probably Has Better Sex Than You

Kristen Stewart would like to inform you that she is likely to star in the probable sequel to Snow White and The Non-Penetrative Infidelity Huntsman: "No one's positive [it'll happen] or anything, but I think there's a strong possibility." And there is a one hundred percent chance that I am totally ambivalent about this news. So. [THR]

This is a commercial for Britney Spears' new perfume "Fantasy Twist." Topnotes of hibiscus, ginger; subtle hints of a White Castle Crave Case, the tears of personal assistants, general pandemonium.


Illustration for article titled Adele Doesnt Care About Her Weight and Probably Has Better Sex Than You

Lindsay Lohan has cancelled her much-anticipated upcoming 20/20 interview with Barbara Walters—breaking her alleged deal with Liz & Dick producers to do the interview in exchange for them to pay off her massive Chateau Marmont bill—because she "didn't like the direction it was going in." Furthermore, her personal assistant, a beleaguered gentleman known here only as Gavin, says that cops "twisted his words" about her summer car accident. Regina George is obviously behind it all. [E!, TMZ]

Illustration for article titled Adele Doesnt Care About Her Weight and Probably Has Better Sex Than You

"The texture just felt so good!' Jenny McCarthy admits she tried to have sex with a tree while high on ecstasy," reads a headline that just needs no further exposition which is great because it's 9 AM and this is usually when I go hump an elm and yell DON'T FUCKING LOOK AT ME. [Daily Mail]

  • Taylor Swift is open to dating a ginger. Who isn't?! [Monsters and Critics]
  • Katie Holmes has enjoyed Franzia in her day. Who hasn't?! [Us Weekly]
  • Amanda Bynes and a VH1 correspondent named Janelle Snowden were at the same nail salon at 2 AM on election night, and Bynes was not into chatting about the election. Bynes/Snowden 2016! [Page Six]
  • This is the first picture of Reese Witherspoon's new baby Tennessee James Toth. [Us Weekly]
  • Some woman tripped on Jamie Foxx's sidewalk and she's suing him now. Trufacts. [Monsters and Critics]
  • Bradley Coop-a-doop almost said no to his Sexiest Man Alive title. [ABC News]
  • Bryan Adams is gonna be a dad for the second time. [People]
  • Scarlett Johansson got a "prison style" horseshoe tattoo, which brings the number of Scarlett Johansson's "prison style" attributes to approximately one (1). [The Frisky]
  • Heidi Klum gushed about her liebchen (in English: "beloved fucknugget"), bodyguard Martin Kristen, in a German magazine. [E!]
  • Kate Walsh, who is great incidentally, is writing a sitcom about her life with her boyfriend and his kids. [Access Hollywood]
  • Ben Affleck put out a casting call for young extras while shooting Argo and a bunch of Olds showed up instead. Hijinks. [Daily Star]
  • Brooke Shields defended her recently-deceased mother Teri from people who criticized her for allowing the young Shields to do nude scenes in films like Pretty Baby. [E!]
  • Erin Heatherton is OK after her split from Leonardo (or that guy who played in Fargo; I think his name was Steve). [Us Weekly]
  • Justin B33bo tried to get it in with some Victoria's Secret models. [Page Six]
  • Nigel Barker's negatives are in danger after Sandy, and that means we might lose a treasure trove of Round 1 derpfaces on ANTM. Time to rally, America. [Page Six]
  • Pharell Williams and Alexa Chung were either nuzzling or just in the same room. Hard to say. [Page Six]
  • Al Pacino had dinner with a blonde woman in her 30s. [Page Six]
  • This picture of Miley Cyrus holding wads of cash while men gyrate in her face on Ellen. [NYDN]
  • Kate Hudson got acne and her hair fell out after she gave birth to her second child. [Radar Online]
  • Um, UM, Octomom's kids might have had access to her Xanax. End of days. [Radar Online]

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So... do most women really enjoy the male stripper thing? Even the thought of it makes me uncomfortable. When I turned 21, I wanted to have a party but my mom told me she would only allow it if I let her hire a stripper. I told her I didn't want one, so no party. But I also couldn't explain to her why I didn't want it. It just doesn't excite me. The opposite, in fact.