Kanye West, America’s tantrum-throwing beat-dropping id, gave an interview to the Times this week so overflowing with self-aggrandizing proclamations practically begging to be ironically cross stitched onto a $30 Etsy throw pillow that it made Muhammad Ali sound like Mahatma Gandhi. But when you strip away the ostentatious comparisons Yeezy makes between himself and every visionary in recent history from Anna Wintour to Steve Jobs, Kanye’s latest isn’t entirely eyeroll-inducing. In fact, West’s life philosophy reads a little like Sheryl Sandberg’s Lean In, but on zoo animal steroids. So in that spirit, here are the LEAN IN-iest nuggets of wisdom Kanye dropped, and how you can use them to make your own Non-ye life approach terminal excellence.
1. On parenthood:
Like, this is my baby. This isn’t America’s Baby.
Kanye to Non-ye translation: Your parenthood decisions aren’t anyone’s business. Not the overly curious lady at the pharmacy around the corner who asks you, when you’re buying pregnancy tests, if you hope it’s positive (HOLLA ,WICKER PARK CVS CIRCA 2009!), not the stranger at the bus stop who touches your pregnant stomach without asking like if she rubs it you’ll grant her a wish, not your friend who had a baby and suddenly became a breastfeeding expert who is creepily concerned with your areolas’ fortitude. And the next time your hippie neighbor waxes poetic about the virtues of raising your kid on only organic soy, just yell THIS ISN’T AMERICA’S BABY!
2. On independence:
Why do you want to control me? Like, I want the world to be better! All I want is positive! All I want is dopeness! Why would you want to control that?
Kanye to Non-ye translation: In a world of grasping capitalist artifice, dopeness is the last pure thing we have. And if all you — YOU PERSONALLY, probable woman reading this — are in the pursuit of dopeness, don’t let anyone tell you what to do. Not your boss. Not your roommate. Not that guy you went out on two OK Cupid dates with. Like Shakespeare said, if dopeness be your pursuit, fuck all the haters, forsooth.
3. On vision:
Yeah, respect my trendsetting abilities. Once that happens, everyone wins. The world wins; fresh kids win; creatives win; the company wins.
Kanye to Non-ye translation: Have faith in your idea of what the world of tomorrow can bring and don’t back down when you know you’ve got a good idea. Don’t do it for you — do it for the fresh kids.
4. On culture:
I understand culture. I am the nucleus.
Kanye to Non-ye translation: I guess this one doesn’t have much crossover relevance to Normals like you or I, but I’ll take a shot: declare yourself the nucleus of something slightly more specific than culture. Your couch, maybe. Then nucleus the fuck out of that couch.
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