As an infant, Eulalia Garcia Maturey entered the U.S. from Mexico. Now thanks to a Certificate of Lawful Entry she received during World War II, she'll become a U.S. citizen next week on the 101st anniversary of her crossing.
This really won't help on the playground behind the UN building:
"Hey, America, yo new citizen's so old, they've got anchor grandbabies!"
"Hey, America, yo new citizen's so old, she was harassed by the original Minute Men!"
"Hey, America, yo immigration and naturalization services are so overburdened and in need of funding, reform, and outreach, it— What? Come back! Don't cry!!"