Zayn Malik, 'Exhausted' By Cheating Rumors, Is Taking a Break From 1D

Illustration for article titled Zayn Malik, Exhausted By Cheating Rumors, Is Taking a Break From 1D

One of the D's from the mysteriously-named boy band One D is going through a lot of stuff right now. After rumors started flying that he was cheating on his fiancé, Zayn Malik (the hottest of all the D's and owner of the best hair) has left the band's most recent tour because he's "exhausted" from all the hate.

On Wednesday, Zayn sent out this bird cry:


Zayn was photographed [AIR HORN] holding hands with a fan on tour in Thailand. Since then, love-a-girl-named Perrie Edwards has been seen leaving their home with a lotta big bags; Zayn's sister has said she does not"not want to lose him for anything"; the rest of the D's have released a statement saying that he "signed off with stress and is flying back to the UK to recuperate" and Zayn does not seem to be doing well, as People reports:

"Zayn is exhausted and just needs a break," the source says. "Out of everyone of the boys, he's the one who struggles dealing with being in the spotlight the most. He can't cope with the level of scrutiny he gets put under. He's just 22."

If two 22-year-old's, one of whom is mega-famous, can't make it in this world, what hope do the rest of us have?

[Hollywood Life/People/Daily Mail]

Illustration for article titled Zayn Malik, Exhausted By Cheating Rumors, Is Taking a Break From 1D

Lil' Wayne and Drake fucked the same girl! Most of us might be, like, yeah, duh/lalala, if Drake was gonna go for Chris Brown's girl, he was definitely gonna go for Wayne's—but Wayne reveals in a new book proposal that Drake told him about his sexual dalliance with the unnamed woman during a visit to see Wayne at Rikers:

Wayne claims while he was serving time at Rikers Island for gun possession, Drake visited him and glibly confessed, saying, "Yeah, it's true. Don't f*** with her like that cause I did f*** her."

Wayne writes, "This is the type of s*** that a man never wants to find out when he's locked up. Or, maybe so, cause only God knows what I would have done if I wasn't locked up right now."

Wayne admits in the proposal he and his GF argued a lot, and that may be why Drake said, "Don't f*** with her like that." As for the timeline, Wayne says the woman told him she had sex with Drake the day before they met.


TMZ says the book has "intense interest from publishers." Had they interviewed me, I would have told them honesty is not always the best policy in relationships and I'm cool not knowing about Drake's past.


Illustration for article titled Zayn Malik, Exhausted By Cheating Rumors, Is Taking a Break From 1D

Speaking of fucking women because there's not much to do: in a new book from comedy writer Ali Adler called How to F*ck a Woman (out in May, available for preorder now), John Stamos reveals that women like to take pics with him after they touch each other intimately:

"A couple of women have wanted 'selfies' afterwards," Stamos says, adding, "One girl really wanted my shirt, like a souvenir."

Sounding a little weird, Stamos suavely notes: "It's about listening, asking, talking . . . I guess I do approach sex in a musical way. With me, it's more rhythm than melody with a woman . . . but it's all listening . . . With women, you have to listen to their bodies."


Listening... asking... talking... music... painting with all the colors of the wind.

[Page Six]

  • Chris Brown is maybe going to sue Oprah because of an interview Iyanla Fix My Life did with Karreuche. [The Hollywood Gossip]
  • Justin Bieber's old neighbor is suing the boy king for being a shitty neighbor. Doesn't he know Bieber's day of repentance airs soon? [Vulture]
  • Emmy Rossum also says Bieber's not a great neighbor, but she's not filing a lawsuit or anything about it; she just won't be borrowing any sugar. [Billboard]
  • Kate Upton doesn't read the internet anymore because it's horrible so I can write whatever I want here hahahaha. [Page Six]
  • Christy Brinkley's ex-husband's latest ex-wife says that he has a "secret pathological predilection" for young ladies. Everyone please stop lying under this old worn-out boot. [Page Six]
  • Here's a photo of Angelina Jolie's wedding to Billy Bob Thorton, thoughtfully provided by the Vegas Reverend who married them; the bride wore jeans. [Daily Mail]
  • Kanye West was supposed to do Jimmy Kimmel's Mean Tweet thing but didn't cause he couldn't find the time. [Page Six]
  • It's almost the weekend and everyone and your mom loves their hot new latex dress! [Daily Mail]

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Zayn Malik (the hottest of all the D's and owner of the best hair)

I must respectfully disagree.