Worth It: Stick Some Flowers On Your Boobs

Much unlike many a magazine editor who recommends you buy all sorts of crap that they most likely got for free, your Jezebel staff doesn’t get jack shit (other than books, unsolicited). And that’s how it should be. But on our own time, in our personal lives, we still buy stuff. So this is Worth It, our daily recommendation of random things that we’ve actually spent our own money on. These are the things we buy regularly or really like, things we’d actually tell our friends about. And now we’re telling you.

In the summer I hate wearing bras. Hate. I will go shopping with the express purpose of finding more dresses that can be worn without a bra. I have little to no tolerance for underboob sweat, and while it’s often unavoidable in the sweltering heat, it’s a hell of a lot less worse than it would be if I were wearing suffocating the girls with an uncomfortable contraption.

But those pesky nipples! When they’re hard, they’re hard to miss, and when they’re soft, they kind of stick out in a slouchy sort of way, enough so to alter the contour of my breast, and it actually accentuates the aforementioned onset of gravity. This is makes it very obvious I am not wearing a bra, and I prefer subtlety when forgoing undergarments.

Thank god for my beloved nipple petals. These babies eliminate any chance of glass cutters and, in the process, give a kind of nice, rounded silhouette, much like you’d get with a bra. The idea is pretty simple: stick them over your nipples and off you go. They’re bigger than tassels, which is perhaps less fun, but certainly more practical. But if you’re a petite lass (I’m a 32B), they’re not so big as to peek out your sluttin-it-up shirts.

There are multiple brands that offer petals in both paper adhesives and silicon gel; I highly recommend the latter, as it goes on more smoothly. And — this is the big thing — the gel ones are reusable. I’ve had mine for well over two years (maybe it’s three now? I’ve lost count), and they still get the job done. Just be sure to put them back in their little plastic case when you’re home for the night. Speaking of, maybe I have once or twice in my life passed out fully clothed, and if I did, they were still in place come morning.

Maidenform Silicone Nipple Covers, $10.00 at Maidenform.com

Worth It only features things we paid for ourselves and actually like. Don’t send us stuff.