Woman Infiltrates Axe's Sausage Fest Astronaut Competition

I might be blowing your mind here, but did you guys know that Axe is totally a dude thing? Like, here’s how it works: you spray on some Axe, maybe you even put some in your hair, and then you go to the A-E-Phi party? And then all of a sudden it’s like all these baby sea turtles (except they’re chicks, like with BOOBS) are following the moon (the Axe) to the ocean (your peen). And that’s how it works.

Anyway, who better to be a spokesman for Axe than the manliest of all men, Buzz Aldrin, who announced a contest to be shot into space by the new Axe Apollo Space Academy (AASA) in a Super Bowl commercial. At the end of which he says “Leave a man, come back a hero.” I wonder who they’re marketing to? (The copy of the ad also referred to “a few brave men” until, wisely, it was edited to “civilians.”)

Anyways, Tumblr user Molly Pfaff, a self-declared fangirl of Dr. Who, Harry Potter, Sherlock and Star Trek, has struck out to be the first Axe-affiliated woman to NOT be chasing a dude down the street and/or licking him on TV. Instead, she’s third place in the AASA contest, with 12,000 votes up against 24,000 and 19,000 (two men).