Sex. Celebrity. Politics. With Teeth
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Sex. Celebrity. Politics. With Teeth

Who Stole This 'Masterpiece' Cheese?

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A heist mystery for your Tuesday morning: Who stole two big, beautiful, valuable blocks of cheddar from the the Yeovil agricultural show in Somerset, England?

“These cheeses could be considered masterpieces; it’s a bit like having a valuable painting stolen,” cheesemaker Rich Clothier of Wyke Farms told the Guardian. It took a year and a half to make the prize-winning cheeses, which he described as complex, having a rounded flavor; “They are among the best we have ever produced.” Here’s how it all went down:

The judges at the Yeovil show had crowned the two hefty blocks of cheese champion and reserve champion and the specimens were being left in a marquee overnight so that they could be admired by members of the public next day.

Thieves took the blocks, weighing 20kg each and with a retail value of around £800, and the winners’ certificates from the tent during overnight on Saturday.

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The question is, was it somebody passing by with an apple he thought could use a little accompaniment? Or was it more premeditated? Clothier told the Guardian that, “he believed the thieves had targeted the prize-winning cheddars and may have been stealing to order. He said it was possible the cheeses were already abroad.” He said: “They left all the other cheeses and just took ours.”

Honestly—rank villainy. Please return this man’s masterpiece cheese.