Where Are You Going In This Teensy-Ass Skirt?

The New York Post wrote a scathing blog about this itty bitty Jacquemus skirt, calling the $260 wisp of fabric a “glorified loincloth.” Jacquemus—the same designer behind those tiny purses that caused a lot of chatter at Paris Fashion Week—has a penchant for making fashion staples pint sized and gargantuan, so this extreme scaling and high price tag is pretty par for the course.

Here’s what the Post had to say:

Things worth $260: a good pair of leather boots or clogs, decent “Hamilton” tickets, a dinner at Per Se.

Things not worth $260: a strip of fabric that some fancy fashion label is trying to convince me is a “skirt.”

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It doesn’t come in any bright jewel tones or funky prints, but in a boring shade of ivory. It doesn’t scream playful provocation so much as Kardashian rip-off. And then there’s the price tag, which one fashionable friend rightly pointed out amounts to about $26 per inch of viscose-polymide blend fabric.

Sorry, but calling this a skirt and selling it for $260 isn’t fashion, it’s a scam!

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But where the New York Post sees deception, I see potential. After all, nothing says I’ve arrived like a fucking $260 piece of stretchy fabric that barely covers your cooter.

Here are a few places where wearing a pricy transparent skirt is, in fact, a very practical item of clothing to wear:

  • A fancy beach.
  • The bedroom before a lil’ fuckaroo.
  • Family reunion.
  • A convention where you’re cosplaying as Paris Hilton circa 2003.
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Okay, I’m tapped out.

Where would you wear this skirt? How would you style it?

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About the author

Ashley Reese

Staff writer, mint chocolate hater.