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As you see from above, someone actually recrusted an Uncrustable. Why? Who knows. Who cares. It’s perfect. What was broken is now whole. What was crustless is now crust. What was not a sandwich is now... something, I don’t really know. When soft frozen bread meets real frozen bread, the world has meaning again.

This is not the first time Uncrustables have been in the news of late. In March, a Tumblr post asked whether or not an Uncrustable was a ravioli. The comparison is not outlandish: like a ravioli, an Uncrustable is a round piece of dough pinched together with a filling inside. But unlike a ravioli, an Uncrustable is disgusting. Case closed.